There must be a rock star checklist

[Jeff Albertson]

1. get out of bed
2. Write some songs
3. Eat lunch
4. Sign with new guitar company, pick out shape
5. Sign with new amp company, pick out logo
6. Make peace with, or replace, singer, bass player, drummer, etc.
7. Record songs
8. Arrange a tour
9. Have dinner
10. Hurry up and record a couple more songs
11. Pick out cover art, tee shirts designs
12. Play Wii or PS3 or both
13. Shoot magizine cover and sign off on article
14. Get squatters and bums out of tour bus
15. Send endorsee checks to bank
16. get drunk, stoned or wired
17. Screw (aging) heavy metal chick and her friend
18. Go to sleep
19. Wake up
20. Go on tour for 7 months
21. Lay low for 6 years

Mustaines on G1 this month, it's gonna be Slash next month (VR's going on tour), then Eddie again, if he's out of rehab. I would guess Metallica's due soon, too.

[69buickman]

Nice

[Bengal]

Actually, it's more like this...

1. Half wake up and yell something stupid at 8am when the crew gets up to unload
2. Wake up a 2pm
3. Sit and stare for an hour
4. Find a crew guy to help them find the dressing room
5. Take a shower
6. Get dressed
7. Find the crew guys because artist is in a bad mood and rake them over the coals because the guitars are facing the wrong way in the boat
8. Have a crew guy find the tour manager
9. Meet with tour manager about the press for the day
10. Get pissed about the press schedule and go find the crew for some more coal raking
11. Do press
12. Pissed at press and not able to tell them, more coal raking for the crew
13. Disappear for at least an hour
14. Take another shower before the show
15. Do the hair
16. Pissed at hair, kill a crew guy because he's standing there
17. Find crew guy to get a rubber band to pull back hair thats already killed one crew guy
18. Assemble back stage
19. Look out at audience, kill another crew guy because the crowd is either too big or too small
20. Walk onstage for show
21. During show, kill the monitor tech
22. End show. Verbally and physically abusing tech because the rig "sounded bad"
23. Meet and greet with fans
24. More coal raking because the fans take up too much time
25. Leave with other band members to go do "whatever"
26. Arive 1 1/2 hours late for bus call
27. Rake the crew again for his tardyness
28. Fall into bunk for sleep with a brief intruption at 8am

Yep... That's more like it...

[Wayniac]

Actually, it's more like this...

1. Half wake up and yell something stupid at 8am when the crew gets up to unload
2. Wake up a 2pm
3. Sit and stare for an hour
4. Find a crew guy to help them find the dressing room
5. Take a shower
6. Get dressed
7. Find the crew guys because artist is in a bad mood and rake them over the coals because the guitars are facing the wrong way in the boat
8. Have a crew guy find the tour manager
9. Meet with tour manager about the press for the day
10. Get pissed about the press schedule and go find the crew for some more coal raking
11. Do press
12. Pissed at press and not able to tell them, more coal raking for the crew
13. Disappear for at least an hour
14. Take another shower before the show
15. Do the hair
16. Pissed at hair, kill a crew guy because he's standing there
17. Find crew guy to get a rubber band to pull back hair thats already killed one crew guy
18. Assemble back stage
19. Look out at audience, kill another crew guy because the crowd is either too big or too small
20. Walk onstage for show
21. During show, kill the monitor tech
22. End show. Verbally and physically abusing tech because the rig "sounded bad"
23. Meet and greet with fans
24. More coal raking because the fans take up too much time
25. Leave with other band members to go do "whatever"
26. Arive 1 1/2 hours late for bus call
27. Rake the crew again for his tardyness
28. Fall into bunk for sleep with a brief intruption at 8am

Yep... That's more like it...

OMG dude ! I fell outta my chair on this one.. were you on the same tours as me!??! lol
That is frickin' hilarious, and pretty close to the truth...

[VitaminG]

[Bengal]

Wayniac,
That was a good day...

[eakinj]

Actually, it's more like this...

1. Half wake up and yell something stupid at 8am when the crew gets up to unload
2. Wake up a 2pm
3. Sit and stare for an hour
4. Find a crew guy to help them find the dressing room
5. Take a shower
6. Get dressed
7. Find the crew guys because artist is in a bad mood and rake them over the coals because the guitars are facing the wrong way in the boat
8. Have a crew guy find the tour manager
9. Meet with tour manager about the press for the day
10. Get pissed about the press schedule and go find the crew for some more coal raking
11. Do press
12. Pissed at press and not able to tell them, more coal raking for the crew
13. Disappear for at least an hour
14. Take another shower before the show
15. Do the hair
16. Pissed at hair, kill a crew guy because he's standing there
17. Find crew guy to get a rubber band to pull back hair thats already killed one crew guy
18. Assemble back stage
19. Look out at audience, kill another crew guy because the crowd is either too big or too small
20. Walk onstage for show
21. During show, kill the monitor tech
22. End show. Verbally and physically abusing tech because the rig "sounded bad"
23. Meet and greet with fans
24. More coal raking because the fans take up too much time
25. Leave with other band members to go do "whatever"
26. Arive 1 1/2 hours late for bus call
27. Rake the crew again for his tardyness
28. Fall into bunk for sleep with a brief intruption at 8am

Yep... That's more like it...

So uh... just how many crew members did you kill?

[dinky kustom]

thats gold:ROTF:

[Fragle]

the funny thing is, leave out the kill/yell at crew stuff and it's pretty much exactly how things are going when you're on tour ´
wake up around 2pm, have a bite, have a shower (if there's one), have a beer, soundcheck, beer, dinner, beer, gig, more beer, repeat

[STLKINGV]

The Roadies Motto

If it's wet, drink it
If it's dry, smoke it
If it moves, fuck it
If it doesn't move...... Load it on the truck!!!



A~

[shobet]

the funny thing is, leave out the kill/yell at crew stuff and it's pretty much exactly how things are going when you're on tour ´
wake up around 2pm, have a bite, have a shower (if there's one), have a beer, soundcheck, beer, dinner, beer, gig, more beer, repeat

Nice avatar, I've consumed a large ammount of various Weißbier, whilst over visiting my other half in Augsburg. If you are ever in Augsburg you should really go and visit the König Von Flandern not far from the Rathaus. They brew their own beer there and I've forgotten many a day/evening whilst quaffing their various drafts. She's moved over here now so I'm missing my Weißwurst, leberkäse and all the beer.

[Bengal]

So uh... just how many crew members did you kill?

I was the one killed, not the one doing the killing...

[Wayniac]

Roadie version

1. Half wake up and get something stupid yelled at you at 8am when you get up to unload
2. Work til 2pm, when the band wakes up. Avoid eye contact and speaking to the band. Keep a low profile, so you don't get killed
3. Watch the singer/guitarist/bassist/drummer sit and stare for an hour
4. Get snagged to help the band find the dressing room
5. Wish you could Take a shower
6. Wish you could change clothes
7. Hide in the tralier because artist is in a bad mood and wants to rake you over the coals because the guitars are facing the wrong way in the boat (even though strings have already been changed, they are tuned, and polished)
8. Get asked a dozen times by 4 different band members to find the tour manager
9. Get yelled at by the tour manager because they have to see the press for the day
10. Get yelled at by band because of press schedule
11. Hate the press
12. More coal raking for the crew because band hates teh press and can't tell them
13. Look for band members for at least an hour
14. Don't interrupt the band while they shower before the show
15. Get conditioner so band can do their hair
16. Avoid band again - Pissed at hair, want to kill a crew guy because he's standing there
17. Have a rubber band or scrunchy handy to pull back hair thats already killed one crew guy
18. Watch band assemble back stage
19. Watch band look out at audience, and try to kill another crew guy because the crowd is either too big or too small
20. Walk sidestage for show
21. During show, watch band kill the monitor tech
22. Take verbal and physical abuse by band because the rig "sounded bad" even though you tweaked EXACTLY how they wanted it
23. Break down/load out while band does meet and greet with fans
24. Take more coal raking because the fans take up too much time
25. Watch band leave with other band members to go do "whatever", while you finish break-down load out
26. Wait1 1/2 hours after loading quickly, without a shower, while band shows up late for bus call
27. Get raked by TM AND band for not being more insistent that they leave the bar/party where-ever
28. Fall into bunk for sleep with a brief interruptions at 3am, 4am, 5 am while various band members puke, run naked through the bus, smash things, or try to drunkenly climb into the wrong bunk.
29. Get raked over by delirious band memebr for being in "his" bunk.
30. Hope to get an apology by said band member when he sobers up in the am, and you had to sleep in the lounge, or stay up and keep the bus driver company all night

[Bengal]

Yep, that's it...

Glamorous, ain't it???

[Sukisyn]

yep ... makes me want to quit my day job and hit the road.