The laws of this country

[atomic charvel guy]

For Godsakes, the kid isn't in a sweat shop sewing soccer balls for minus $0.03 cents an hour. I'm probably way late with this one but I had to post this-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfjTrrBE_eI&feature=fvw

[texasfury]

This obviously a plot perpetrated by The Man, to keep a honky down.

[atomic charvel guy]

unbelievable ain't it? The kid can have a beer in a place if there is a guardian present, but god forbid he plays in the same place? Bass ackwards i tell you.

[Endrik]

I bet there's a lot of old weird laws in each state which even most lawyers aren't familiar with.
Like you can't mispronounce the state's name, female's can't wear a dress, you can't catch a fish with a lasso, you can't drink a beer if your shoelaces are untied etc.

[atomic charvel guy]

"can't be a millionaire and do detective work on the side" like Robert Wagner in Hart to Hart.
Yup, that's what I'd do if I were a multi-millionaire, get a second job, preferably one where i could get shot in the face.

[atdguitars]

There is a little town not far from me that still has "Hitching Post Laws" on the books as to where you can still hitch your horse. For years another town had laws against minors using pinball machines because they were gaming devices.
Lots of stupid shit on the books still.

[Endrik]

Alabama

Mobile, AL, passed an ordinance prohibiting women from wearing shoes with heels more than 1 1/2 inches high. Those who wish to wear higher heels may obtain a special permit.
It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.
Under Alabama law, anyone who wears a false mustache in church and causes "unseemly laughter" is subject to arrest.
Mobile passed an ordinance prohibiting women from wearing shoes with heels more than 1 1/2 inches high. Those who wish to wear higher heels may obtain a special permit.
In Mobile, it is illegal for pigeons to eat pebbles from composite roofs.


Alaska

An ordinary citizen can be designated as a marriage commissioner by simply petitioning the court.
Adultery may not be grounds for divorce if the action hasn't commenced within two years of the discovery of the act by the other spouse.
A marriage can be considered void if there is failure to consummate the marriage at the time of the marriage and still hasn't been consummated when filing for divorce.
Strong penalties exist in Alaska for allowing huskies inside school buildings.
No youngster is allowed to build a snowman taller than himself on school property.
In Fairbanks, it's against the law to park your horse on city streets. It is O.K. to park your dog sled.
A law in Fairbanks, does not allow moose to have sex on city streets.


Arizona

It is illegal to hunt camels within the state borders.
In Glendale, Arizona, it is against the law for a car to back up.
In Hackberry, gargling is prohibited while flying.
In Nogales, an ordinance prohibits the wearing of suspenders.
In Tucson, women may not wear pants.


Arkansas

It is illegal to mispronounce the name of the state of Arkansas.


California

In California, animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet ofa tavern, school, or place of worship.
Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.
It is illegal to set a mousetrap without a hunting license.
Women may not drive in a house coat.
Single women in California are prohibited from entering a place of business where men can be observed standing before mirrors, exhibiting themselves in a semi-naked state while lifting weights.
In some California towns, it is illegal for businesses to have flashy, neon lights at night.
Under California state law, it is illegal to peel an orange in a hotel room.
In Apple Valley, ducks aren't allowed to be heard quacking after 10:00 p.m.
In Arcadia, "Young women are prohibited from drinking coffee after 6:00 p.m."
In Baldwin Park, "No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any street within this community unless she is escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club." Amendment - The provisions of this status shall not apply to females weighing less than 90 pounds or exceeding 200 pounds nor shall it apply to female horses.
In Bellflower, a drunken man had a good a right to a perfect sidewalk as a sober man since he needs one a good deal more.
In Berkeley, it's against the law to whistle for your lost canary before 7:00 A.M.
In Buena Park, males are prohibited from "turning and looking at a woman in'that way'."Second offenders has to "wear horse blinders" for a 24-hour period in public.
In Castaic, the law allows that if a dentist accidently pulls the wrong tooth, the patient has the right to pull one of the dentist's teeth in return.
In Covina, a husband is not guilty of desertion when the wife rents his room to a boarder and crowds him out of the house.
In El Monte, "Horses are prohibited from falling asleep in a bathtub, unless the rider is also sleeping with the horse."
In Hemet, a driver of "any vehicle involved in an accident resulting in death...shall immediately stop...and give his name and address to the person struck.
In Hesperia, dueling is outlawed when the opponents select water pistols as weapons.
In Hollywood, droves of more than 2,000 sheep could not be driven down Hollywood Boulevard.
In Inglewood, it is unlawful for any male person, within the corporate limits of the city, to wink at any female person with whom he is unacquainted.
In Long Beach, every woman must be found wearing a corset when attending a public dance. A physician is required to inspect each female.
In Los Angeles, customers in meat markets are prohibited from poking a turkey to see how tender it is.
In Los Angeles, you cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
In Los Angeles, a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can't be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife's consent to beat her with a wider strap.
In Los Angeles, it is unlawful for an acrobat to perform on any city sidewalk because it might frighten the horses.
In Malibu, it is unlawful to "laugh-out-loud" in a movie theater.
In Monrovia, no young man can marry the girl of his dreams until he has "proven his manhood."How?It's quite simple; all the poor fellow is required to do is go out and shoot six blackbirds or three crows which then must be brought to his prospective father-in-law.
In Pacific Grove, a city ordinance makes it a misdemeanor to kill or threaten a butterfly.
In Riverside, it is unlawful to "stick out your tongue in the direction of a dog."
In Rosemead, it is against the law to eat ice cream in public with a fork.
In Santa Ana,it is illegal to let a horse sleep in a bakery.
In Temecula, playing cards with a pregnant woman or a child on the curb of any street is prohibited.
In Valencia, barbers are forbidden to eat onions between the hours of 7:00 a.m. and 7:00 p.m.
In Ventura County, cats and dogs are not allowed to have sex without a permit.
In Ventura County, a person may not make "ugly faces at dogs found to be free roaming the community."
In Victorville, it is unlawful to shoot canned foods open with a revolver.
In Whittier, "Two vehicles which are passing each other in opposite directions shall have the right-of-way."


Colorado

In Denver, it is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor


Connecticut

You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
In Harford, you aren't allowed to cross a street while walking on your hands.

In Hartford, it is illegal to kiss your wife on Sunday.


Delaware

It is against the law for a newlywed husband to go fishing during the honeymoon. He must take her shopping, however, if she requests it.
It is against the law to pawn your wooden leg.


Florida

Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
Topless walking or running within a 150 foot zone between the beach and the street is prohibited.
Jogging with your eyes closed is against the law.
Florida deals with its prostitution problem by giving prostitutes spending money, a five-year banishment, and a bus ticket out of town.
Key West has an ordinance prohibiting turtle racing within the city limits.
In Miami, it's illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
In Sarasota, it is illegal to wear swimwear while singing in a public place.


Georgia

Georgia has a law prohibiting people from saying "Oh boy" in public.
Flying the confederate flag is outlawed on government property, except in South Carolina and Georgia, where it is required to be flown.
In Atlanta it's against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or a street lamp.
In Quitman, it is against the law for a chicken to cross any road within the city limits.


Hawaii

It is a crime to insert a penny in your ear


Idaho

Idaho anti-delinquency statutes prohibit juveniles from deliberately stepping on ants.
In Idaho, the law states that all boxes of candy given as romantic gifts must weigh more than 50 pounds.
If a police officer in Coeur d'Alene suspects a couple is having sex inside a vehicle, the officer must honk the horn three times, and wait two minutes before being allowed to approach the scene.


Illinois

An old law in Illinois states animals can be sent to jail.
Illinois authorized towns to require every citizen, between 21 and 50 years of age, to labor in the streets for two days a year.
It is against the law to use a slingshot unless you are a police officer.
A hat pin is considered a concealed weapon in the city of Chicago. This law dates back to the time that women would carry a hat pin as a form of defense.
Illinois law prohibits barefoot dancing and taking a nap on the dance floor.
According to an Illinois state law, women must address bachelors as "master" instead of "mister".
In Chicago, it is against the law to eat in an establishment that is on fire.
In Joliet, women can be arrested for trying on more than six dresses in one store.
In Oak Park, a law prohibits roosters from crowing before 6:00 a.m.
In Oblong, a law makes it a crime to make love while fishing or hunting on your wedding day.
Winnetka theater managers can kick out any patron who has "odoriferous feet."
In Zion, it is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animals kept as pets.


Indiana

Bathing is prohibited during the winter.
"Spiteful gossip", defined as "talking behind a person's back","unwarranted" or "without cause, is illegal in Indiana.
French Lick Springs once passed a law requiring all black cats to wear bells on Friday the 13th.
In Gary, persons are prohibited from attending a movie house or other theater and from riding a public streetcar within four hours of eating garlic.
In Muncie, it is a crime to carry a fishing tackle into a cemetery.


Iowa

Bathing is prohibited during the winter.
Public kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes.
One-armed piano players must perform for free.
Male inmates in Iowa who are so inclined to dress up like a woman are prohibited from wearing shoes with heels measuring more than 2 and one-quarter inches high.
In Ames, a husband may not take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with his wife.
Corning forbade a man asking his wife to ride in any motor vehicle.
In Ottumwa, "It is unlawful for any male person, within the corporate limits of the (city), to wink at any female person with whom he is unacquainted."


Kansas

Pedestrians crossing the highways at night must wear tail lights.
No one may catch fish with his bare hands.
An ordinance in Lawrence, forbids anyone to carry bees in his hat while on the city streets.
In McLough, it's illegal to wash your false teeth in a public drinking fountain.
In Natoma, Kansas it's against the law to practice knife throwing at men wearing striped suits.


Kentucky

In Kentucky, "No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she be escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club"
- An amendment to the above legislation: "The provisions of this statute shall not apply to females weighing less than 90 pounds nor exceeding 200 pounds, nor shall it apply to female horses."
By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."
It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
It is a crime to bathe less than once a year
It is illegal to marry the same man more than 3 times.
In Frankfort, it is a crime to shoot off a policeman's tie.
In Owensboro, it is illegal for a woman to buy a new hat without her husband trying it on first.


Louisiana

It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault."
Louisiana law prohibits couples who are shopping for a new bed from putting it to the "ultimate test" -- in other words, from trying it out by making love on it, or even simulating this activity.
It is illegal to wear an alligator costume.


Maine

In Portland, it's illegal to tickle a girl under the chin with a feather duster.


Maryland

It is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one minor exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."
In parts of Maryland, a woman may not go through her husband's pockets while he is sleeping.
In Baltimore, it's illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits.
In Baltimore, it's illegal to take a lion to the movies.


Massachusetts

Mourners at a wake may not eat more than 3 sandwiches.
Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.
In 1659, Massachusetts made Christmas illegal.
It is unlawful to add ketchup to baked beans in Boston.
Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
In Boston, it is a crime to bathe more than once a week.
In Boston, it is illegal to take a bath unless one has been ordered to by a physician.
In Lynn, it is illegal to give a child a cup of coffee.


Michigan

In Michigan, a woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.

It is illegal to put a skunk in your boss' desk.
In Michigan, a man legally owns his wife's hair.
In 1850, the fair and level-minded people of the state of Michigan, who were clearly opposed to slavery and unlawful imprisonment, included this into their state constitution: "Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, unless for the punishment of crime, shall ever be tolerated in this state." By adding the part about "...unless punishment of crime," they accidentally legalized slavery as a punishment of a crime!
- It was not until 1963 that the comma was shifted to follow the word servitude instead of the word slavery that slavery was once again outlawed in the state of Michigan.
In Clawson, MI, there is a law that makes it LEGAL for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.

In Detroit, couples are banned from making love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property.


Minnesota

It is illegal to tease skunks.
A law in Alexandria makes it illegal for a husband to make love to his wife if his breath smells like garlic, onions, or sardines.
By law, every man in Brainerd must grow a beard.


Mississippi

Being barefoot is allowed around friends and acquaintances, but outlawed among strangers.
Mississippi has laws against "rowdy cats" who freely roam the city limits. If the owner can be located, he or she may be placed in jail along with his or her cat.
In Canton, you can't kill a squirrel with a gun in a courtroom.
In Meridian, the law forbids you to roll a safe down the street on its wheels.


Missouri

In Kansas City, children can buy shotguns... but not toy cap guns.
In Leadwood, no pilot can eat unshelled roasted peanuts or watermelon while flying.
In Merryville, women are prohibited from wearing corsets because "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male."
In St. Louis, it's illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket.


Montana

It is a misdemeanor to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime
In Bozeman, you can't perform any sexual acts in the front yard of your home after sundown if you are nude.
A Helena law states that a woman cannot dance on a saloon table unless her clothing weighs more than three pounds, two ounces.


Nebraska

A parent can be arrested if his child cannot hold back a burp during a church service.
Hotel owners in Hastings are required by law to provide a clean, white cotton nightshirt to each guest. According to the law, no couple may have sex unless they are wearing the nightshirts.
It is unlawful to eat fried chicken while walking down the sidewalk in Oklahoma.
In Omaha, it's against the law to burp, or sneeze in a certain church.


Nevada

In Nevada sex without a condom is considered illegal.
"Spiteful gossip", defined as "talking behind a person's back", "unwarranted" or "without cause, is illegal in Nevada.


New Hampshire

If you bring a raccoon's head to the Henniker, New Hampshire town hall, you are entitled to receive $.10 from the town.


New Jersey

You cannot pump your own gas. All gas stations are full service only.
In Liberty Corner, any couple making out inside a vehicle, and accidentally sounding the horn during their lustful act, may be taken to jail.
In Newark, unless you have a doctor's note, it's illegal to buy ice cream after 6:00 P.M.
In Ocean City, it is against the law to slurp your soup at a restaurant.


New Mexico

New Mexico requires the man to pump the gas, and won't allow the woman to do it. Men must willingly volunteer to pump for single ladies. The same rule applies to flat tires.
During lunch breaks in Carlsbad, no couple should engage in a sexual act while parked in their vehicle, unless their car has curtains.
In Carrizozo, NM, it's forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public (includes legs and face).
In Quemado, a newspaper can be fined if it misspells a person's name in print.


New York

A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that way."
- A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.
It is against the law to throw a ball at someone's head for fun.
The penalty for jumping off a building is death.
In Carmel, a man can't go outside while wearing a jacket and pants that do not match.
In Greene, it's illegal to eat peanuts and walk backward down the street while a concert is on.
In New York, it is unlawful to eat soup with a fork and suck up spaghetti strand by strand.
An old New York City law says you cannot fire a cannon except with the mayor's permission.
It's against the law to walk down the street while reading in New York City.
In Woodstock, it is illegal to walk your bear on the street without a leash.


North Carolina

A North Carolina law said an elephant could not be used to plow a cotton field.

North Carolina forbids sex outside of marriage, or "fornication", but the girlfriend as well as the man would have to be prosecuted.


North Dakota

Beer & pretzels can't be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant.
In North Dakota, it is still legal to shoot Indians if you're in a covered wagon.


Ohio

Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state.
It is illegal to get a fish drunk.
It is illegal to advertise beer if you are wearing a Santa Claus suit, including if you are a dog.
In Cleveland, it is a crime to catch mice without a hunting license.
In Cleveland, women aren't allowed to wear patent-leather shoes in public - a man might see the reflection of something "he oughtn't!"
In Oxford, it's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.
In Toledo, it is a crime to throw a reptile at someone.


Oklahoma

Violators can be fined, arrested and/or jailed for making ugly faces at dogs.
Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state.
Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property.
State law prohibits anyone taking a bite out of another's hamburger.
It is unlawful to eat fried chicken while walking down the sidewalk in Oklahoma.
It's against the law to get a fish drunk in Oklahoma.
Clinton, has a law against masturbating while watching two people having sex in a car.

Oregon

In Willowdale, no man may curse while having sex with his wife.


Pennsylvania

A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling.
No man may purchase alcohol without written consent from his wife.
Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue."
When an automobile and a horse and rider meet on the road, the owner of the automobile must stop and dissemble his automobile so as to not frighten the animal. He may not assemble the auto until the animal is out of sight.
In Harrisburg, it is illegal to have sex with a truck driver inside a toll booth.
In Philadelphia, wrestlers could be fined if they tossed their opponents out of the ring.


Rhode Island

In Wakefield, citizens are not allowed to enter an airplane within four hours of eating garlic.


South Carolina

Flying the confederate flag is outlawed on government property, except in South Carolina and Georgia, where it is required to be flown.


South Dakota

Hotels in Sioux Falls are required by law to furnish their rooms with twin beds only. There should be a minimum of two feet between the beds, and it is illegal for a couple to make love on the floor between the beds.


Tennessee

It is illegal to use lassos to catch a fish.
Anyone who has ever witnessed a cockfight, or is a preacher, is banned for life from public office in Tennessee.
A man must walk in front of any car driven by a woman while waving a red flag as a warning.


Texas

A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining a special five-dollar permit.
It is illegal have more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
In the state of Texas it is a misdemeanor if two men engage in oral and or anal sex and is considered sodomy. The same law does not apply to men and women engaging in the same activity with each other.
In Texas, sixteen-year old divorced girls are prohibited from talking about sex during high school extracurricular activities.
It is against the law to litter or do anything "unsanctimoniously" at the Alamo.
In Texas, it's illegal to put graffiti on someone else's cow.
It's legal for a chicken to have sex with you, but it's illegal to reciprocate.
It is illegal to curse in front of or indecently expose a corpse.
As late as 1932, jail-breaking in Texas was not a crime if the prisoner escaped without using a gun.
In Kingsville, there is a law against two pigs having sex on the city's airport property.


Utah

Utah state legislation outlaws all sex with anyone but your spouse.
Intercourse with your spouse is legal, but any other type of sexual contact including oral sex, anal sex or masturbation is considered sodomy, which is illegal in the state of Utah.
Polygamy (more than one wife) -- provided that only the missionary position has been applied -- is considered a misdemeanor.
Sex with an animal -- unless performed for profit, is NOT considered sodomy and therefore is legal.
In Ceder City, it's illegal to drink beer if your shoelaces are untied.
Salt Lake City has a law against carrying an unwrapped ukulele on the street.
A Tremonton law states that no woman is allowed to have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance. In addition to normal charges, the woman's name will be published in the local newspaper. The man does not receive any punishment.


Vermont

Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each week -- on Saturday night.
It is a crime to whistle underwater
It is illegal to stick lighted sparklers in your ears and nose and run up and down the street.
It is illegal for women to wear false teeth without the written permission of their husbands.


Virginia

It is illegal to sell peanut brittle on Sundays.
Flipping a coin in a restaurant to see who pays for coffee is outlawed.
In Norfolk, it is a crime to go to a public dance without a corset on if you are a girl.
In Norfolk, no woman may go in public without wearing a corset.


Washington

People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.
There is a law designed to reduce crime that clearly states:"It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town."
In the state of Washington there is a law against having sex with a virgin under any circumstances, including the night of the wedding.
An old law in Bellingham made it illegal for a woman to take more than 3 steps backwards while dancing.
A Seattle city ordinance bans lollipops.
In Seattle, goldfish can ride the city buses in bowls only if they keep still


Washington DC

The only acceptable sexual position is the missionary-style position. Any other sexual position is considered illegal.


West Virginia

In Nicholas County, WV, no member of the clergy is allowed to tell jokes or humorous stories from the pulpit during a church service.
No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions."


Wisconsin

Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons.
In Connorsville, no man shall shoot off a gun while his female partner is having a sexual orgasm.
According to a Marinette court, it was legal to punch a waiter in the nose if he showed up with the wrong dinner.
In Racine, it is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.


Wyoming

Wyoming prohibits fat people (defined as 100 pounds or more overweight) from swinging on swings or using other playground or park equipment.
An ordinance in Newcastle specifically bans couples from having sex while standing inside a store's walk-in-meat freezer.

[atomic charvel guy]

In New York it is unlawful for the Jets to achieve.

[Jayster]

Tommy, that's crazy and disheartening ~ unfortunately common sense has been a casualty to the new Amerika. My take on this is that it may help T-man find other venues possibly recording opportunities. If there's no such thing as bad publicity anymore, this certainly makes the kid look great!

[etepbbb]

I saw something about this kid last summer. All the "pro" acts in town were pissed because he was getting gigs, and they weren't. No doubt thats the origin of the letter, and probably the tip to the Wis. Dept. of Labor.

[Grandturk]

In New York it is unlawful for the Jets to achieve.

And here I thought it was just because they sucked...

[Musician78]

New Hampshire

If you bring a raccoon's head to the Henniker, New Hampshire town hall, you are entitled to receive $.10 from the town.

That's awesome. Henniker is the next town over. If I give them 20,000 raccoon heads, I could get another USA KV2. :idea:

[RacerX]

Boo hoo, now he really has something to sing blues about

As to Endrik's list: it's mostly if not all BS: http://www.snopes.com/legal/arizona.asp

[wilkinsi]

"Boogers may not be flicked into the wind. "

[tomanyjacksons]

To many laws written to save idiots from themselves. Natural selection used to work so well. To bad for the kid, alot of jealous morons out there.