HBD MarkD and Rsmacker ......

[Jayster]

markD ~ hbd my Bro, Disney is always gonna rack the nerves. Believe it or not Rsmackers'a made @ least 3 guitar related posts( in the 2 years I've been on this board). If I'm not mistaken ..............

The gentlemen's got a snakeskin charvel<and a ratty looking couch>.That he tried to cheat customs on ...............

HBD ~ you sick freak Rsmacker, Don't tell us what you did or didn't do tonight!!! We all know you acted like you!

[Jayster]

Limbering up for a swingers' party tonight with some friends, and tomorrow I'm going to see some other good shagging friends who've promised me a treat!!!!
!

So Simon's driving???

[RacerX]

This thread reminds me of the time I worked for the Fire Dept, buyer's office, they'd combine birthdays -- and cakes -- for the month, this one year the other b-day in my month was skinny little gay dude (he'd deny it, but would have like, gay porno mags visible in his car ). So my boss (this totally smokin hot Latina) bought (one) cake and written on it was "Happy Birthday Ron & -----" (I forgot the gay dude's name, but I remember hating that both our names were on that fuggin' cake.

So, anyway, happy birthday skinny little gay dude...and you guys!

[Rsmacker]

markD ~ hbd my Bro, Disney is always gonna rack the nerves. Believe it or not Rsmackers'a made @ least 3 guitar related posts( in the 2 years I've been on this board). If I'm not mistaken ..............

The gentlemen's got a snakeskin charvel<and a ratty looking couch>.That he tried to cheat customs on ...............

HBD ~ you sick freak Rsmacker, Don't tell us what you did or didn't do tonight!!! We all know you acted like you!

Ohhhhhhhhhh, go on then, I'll tell you about my weekend, since it's obvious you do want to know really.

Well, I actually started the celebrations early. Like Monday. I acquired another fuck-buddy and went down and defiled her royally at home (ie. buggered her), her neighbours must love the sight of my Discovery Death Machine already, ploughing up the verge and parking where the fuck I want and then making her scream the place down for a couple of hours. Thanks to the wonders of modern technology her kids can contact her the moment they are out of school, leaving me to time the pop-shot just as they are rounding the final bend towards home, wiping my sweaty nuts on the tea-towel and into the car before they get home and see the state of their Mummy. Perfect.
Weds was a daytime party held by a dominatrix I know, she has one every month, sort of open house. Of course I like to go and take my punishment like a man and spew some goo over her "guest Domme" friends who help her out. Most refreshing.

Friday Fetish Party, the aforementioned fuck-buddy happens to work in the club it's held at, so she spent most of her shift on her knees. Customer satisfaction, he he. I also managed to put a seemingly nice bespectacled middle-aged lady to the sword after her husband got sick of her bugging him. I took her away and kept her busy whilst he went and porked someone else. (A geezer, I suspect, but didn't really fancy hearing the gory details, so I left it at that) Apparently she's a school-teacher. Full marks.

Saturday was rather interesting. Being as I was officially an Old Fart on Sat, I was feeling my age, flagging a little. After a fix of chocolate cake (no, really, it's not a euphemism) and having to blow out candles for my little nieces, I was ready to throw some more Harry Monk about. Off ot a swingers' party at another club. Now this was a little more restrained, and I don't mean in the chained to a wall sense of the word. The theme was Drs and Nurses, luckily (and quite possibly scarily) I have a long white coat and a stethoscope, so I was off to take some temperatures with my special instrument. Anally, vaginally and orally, in that order. (Oh, with a "Bag-piping" too, for thoroughness) Met some friends I hadn't seen for a while, violated them, and was about beat at 4 am.
Then I happened to strike up a conversation with a buxom blonde wearing a big black cape (erm, like the Emperor from Star Wars). We got on swimmingly, and before long I was licking molten chocolate off her MASSIVE tits poured out of a chocolate fountain. Turns out she's as kinky as fuck, loves S&M. Alas, we were turfed out of the club because they wanted to close, so I had to continue assaulting her over the bonnet of her nice Z4, all the time while her friend sat in the car, handbag clutched on her lap, face like stone, staring straight ahead pretending not to see me as I gurned and leered at her. Ding dong.

We swapped numbers, I have unfinished business to attend to there.

Sunday and off to yet another club. This time to meet a couple I have become good friends with. The gal is beautiful, I would crawl over miles of broken glass just to stick matchsticks in her shit. Yep, that good. Such a nice girl too, but absolutely fucking filthy. Champagne and jacuzzi, DP and facial, phew, what a night. I tend to ignore everyone else at that club when I'm with them, no-one comes close in the looks and body stakes. Plus I know it pisses the other single blokes off that I'm the only one allowed to share! Ha, fuck 'em.

Today it's back to work, and I'm up and about amazingly early. Got to do some paperwork before the inevitable fatigue strikes. The thing is that tonight I'm taking the blonde out for drinks and some nosh. Well, she's going to nosh my purple helmet, that's for sure. And I'm going to whip her arse too. Oh yes.

Tomorrow I have a special delivery to my fuck-buddy scheduled. Oh, and somewhere along the line I have to do some fucking work (as opposed to some work fucking) because I'm skint and I want a new Jaguar. It's a hard life. Giggety giggety goo.

Thanks again for all your birthday greetings, hope yours was great too MarkD, I have an unrealised ambition to get a BJ at Disney. From Goofy. Anyway, I feel a mid-life crisis coming on, I think I might do something rash, like go and buy a cardigan and some slippers. Aaargh

[Rsmacker]

So Simon's driving???

We don't call him that. We call him "Bitch Boi", and he's driving me round the bend with his constant demands for ever kinkier sex and rack-mounting power distros.






Oh, and it's a snakeskin Jackson, pay attention.

[lerxstcat]

Belated HBD, guys!

[FlyingSkull]

! Happy B day!