70000 Tons of Metal

[Hellbat]

http://70000tons.com/home.htm

Discuss. I would dig it just for Uli...

[jacksonaxes]

Sure sounds cool.

[MakeAJazzNoiseHere]

Fun in the sun on a cruise ship?

That is the essence of METAL.

[Trem]

Raven Saxon Sodom Trouble

Wow, still 29 bands unconfirmed too..

[Sharkfin]

That may be the skankiest cruise ever

[Hellbat]

There is no doubt it will be a sausage fest of epic proportions.

It will probably be the last one ever too because I can't see that fancy cruise ship being in the same shape after having 2000 moshers rampaging on it for a week.

[Nightbat]

Or there's so much security, you'd enjoy more freedom being a Taliban in Guantanamo Bay

[dg]

There is no doubt it will be a sausage fest of epic proportions.

The only female will be the chick from Epica, and they'll have to fly her in & out like the Playmates in Apocalypse Now.

This sounds like something out of Metalocalypse. They should definitely do a DethCruise episode.

[Rsmacker]

That ship has some fucking great kit on it, but when I worked on it, we took all of our own stuff onboard, and because it is considered to be US territory (fucked if I know how they work that one out), we had to get Carnets for every single item, we were considered to be exporting it (then re-importing 2 days later when we returned to dry land). Couldn't take food on or off, because of quarantine rules. It's like a huge shopping mall, doesn't pitch or roll like a proper ship, it's very sterile. Down one end of the concourse, there's a glass elevator which goes up about 11 floors, in no way would you think you were afloat. It'd be my idea of hell being on there with a ship full of chavscum during one of their cruises, we were only on there for a special charter with about 1500 well-behaved, civilised lawyers.

We did, however, get all our food and drink for nowt, and understandably decided to drink as much free pop as we could get down our necks. This is where I may possibly have shown myself up a little, after drinking gallons of girly cocktails, before finding myself in a hot tub with a load of high-powered lawyers, including some geezer who apparently is the "second most powerful" person in the USA, some senator. Well, me and him got on like a house on fire,I gave him some tips on places to go drinking and shagging in Barcelona, and he did seem to be listening carefully.
It was then that someone questioned which office I came from. I had to 'fess up to not being a lawyer, but a sound engineer, and they were out of that tub like Trident missiles. Must have been me telling them about this midget with a banana up her arse that I saw. (I was only lying, but I guess they really wanted to see such a spectacle and were keen to go into the city)

As I was staggering around the decks later that evening, bollock naked and pissed as a rat, looking for some cute lawyer chick to slap my balls on, I was talking to one of the crewmen who told me that my behaviour wasn't that bad. Talk about throwing down the gauntlet!
He said that they regularly do Gay Cruises, where I suppose everyone wears sailor outfits and there's something to do with "salty seamen", and apparently they are mental.
I think 2000 sausage jockeys loose on the high seas, ramped up on Poppers and Pink Babycham, all looking to get pegged, would be far worse a scenario than 2000 moshers. Evidently the gayboys just wander around naked and bugger each other anywhere they choose. (Steady on Wilksy Baby, I'm NOT letting you go on one)
I think they just hose the ship down from one end to the other with disinfectant afterwards:
"Don't touch that!! That's not a jellyfish!!!! It's a .......aaaaaaargh, too late!"

Anyway, I accepted defeat there and then, I wasn't going to top that, so went for a poo in my Executive top of the range cabin, where I was found by the maid next morning. (Erm, in the toilet, obviously. I didn't just drop anchor in the cabin)

Sooooooo, I'd go on this cruise, just to see the mighty kings of metal SAXON!!!!!
Fucking hell, not at those prices though.
Actually, looking at the rest of the bands, it looks like a prime candidate for a boat to "disappear" in the Bermuda Triangle, never to be heard from again, along with a load of ageing Dad-rockers in their 1983 denim cutoff and grey ponytails.
It's actually more like Voyage of the Damned, or Event Horizon.

[Hellbat]

"Don't touch that!! That's not a jellyfish!!!! It's a .......aaaaaaargh, too late!"

AHAHAHAH! That made my day.

[Jayster]

Sooooooo, I'd go on this cruise, just to see the mighty kings of metal SAXON!!!!!
Fucking hell, not at those prices though.
Actually, looking at the rest of the bands, it looks like a prime candidate for a boat to "disappear" in the Bermuda Triangle, never to be heard from again, along with a load of ageing Dad-rockers in their 1983 denim cutoff and grey ponytails.
It's actually more like Voyage of the Damned, or Event Horizon.

Funny, I was thinking the same thing ~ except the bermuda triangle. I'm thinking about going, and I'll bring my own female(as they might be scarce)!!!!

[m2pmd70]

Hell bring several females and make some money. lol

[Twitch]

God, is there any originality anymore?? All their fuggin logos look the same, and Im willing to bet the all sound the same too.(post must be read in a low register mono tone growl)

[Newc]

Fucking Hell, if they DON'T get Deathklok on there, WTF is the world coming to?