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The reason why the Rapture didn't happen today

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  • The reason why the Rapture didn't happen today


  • #2
    You should go post that on some christian web forums and see how long it lasts there.
    "clean sounds are for pussies" - Axewielder

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    • #3
      its not supposed to happen to 6pm
      shawnlutz.com

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      • #4
        I make it 1805hrs. WTF is this rapture?
        Fuck ebay, fuck paypal

        "Finger on the trigger, back against the wall. Counting rounds and voices, not enough to kill them all" (Ihsahn).

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        • #5
          That pic was snapped just before Macho Man bounced off of Jesus' personal force field and tumbled down the stairs into Hell!
          Ron is the MAN!!!!

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          • #6
            I was given a religion's speech for posting this on my Facebook wall.

            'the fuck, it's supposed to be funny. LAUGH!
            I <3 DR Strings.

            2007 Jackson KV2
            2006 Schecter C1 Blackjack
            Randall RG75G2
            Line 6 PODxt

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            • #7
              Ohhhh, Macho man is dooown......whats this? Hulk Hogan has stepped into the ring.........
              HTTP 404 - Signature Not Found

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Shawn Lutz View Post
                its not supposed to happen to 6pm
                I was wondering why nothing had happened here yet, and then I found out that God operates on US time
                Hail yesterday

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                • #9
                  lol Gary, the whack job who predicted this said it was going to happen everywhere around the globe starting at 6pm and roll its way across timezones. Funny the dude predicted the same in 94 I believe and was wrong again. For someone who studies the Bible he's not very smart. The second coming will be known by no man, angel or even the son of God, Jesus Christ himself. His dad is just gonna say to his son, dude its on and that will be it...
                  shawnlutz.com

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                  • #10
                    That's hilarious!
                    "I would have banned you for taking part in hijacking and derailing a thread when you could have started your own thread about your own topic." - Unknown

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Shawn Lutz View Post
                      ......Jesus Christ himself. His dad is just gonna say to his son, dude its on and that will be it...
                      Freekin hilarious.
                      HTTP 404 - Signature Not Found

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                      • #12
                        That ain't accurate.
                        The Macho Man should be holding the ring bell as he comes off the top rope.
                        Build a man a fire and he's warm for a day, set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Shawn Lutz View Post
                          lol Gary, the whack job who predicted this said it was going to happen everywhere around the globe starting at 6pm and roll its way across timezones.
                          that seems like the practical solution. God can hang out in one spot with her handbasket and pick off the good christians as they spin by with the planet's rotation.
                          Hail yesterday

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by wilkinsi View Post
                            I make it 1805hrs. WTF is this rapture?
                            It's when I come round to your house, pull down your pants and frantically bum you, whilst swilling champagne, blaspheming and cursing God, intoxicated by my animalistic urge to squirt my musky spunk into your pulsing, pouting stink-hole, drinking down the heady scent of your craven submission to me; worship your idol of flesh, me, your Big Daddy Luv-Cum, rampant, thrusting, bucking like a twisting satyr, rutting as the blood-red sun sets for the final time, sinking into the golden lake of burning suphur which leads to Final Judgement and ultimately Damnation. Just another Saturday night for us two then. Love you, sugar!
                            So I woke up,rolled over and who was lying next to me? Only Bonnie Langford!

                            I nearly broke her back

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Sephiroth View Post
                              A ticket to Hell has never been funnier
                              I want to depart this world the same way I arrived; screaming and covered in someone else's blood

                              The most human thing we can do is comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.

                              My Blog: http://newcenstein.com

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