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Another film fuck-up imminent...

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  • Another film fuck-up imminent...

    What the fuck is going on?

    I have just seen a trailer on telly for "Conan the Barbarian", which apparently is in cinemas soon. I dare say the Yanks have already seen it. There is already a pretty good fucking film called "Conan the Barbarian", featuring Ah-nold, why would anyone want to see what looks to be a cartoon starring a fag? (Um, not the Austrian fag this time)

    Why can't film-makers just leave classic films alone, they will NEVER better them? I tried to watch the remake of "Day of the Dead" last night on telly, but it was impossible. The CGI just looks shit, actually, beyond shit. Surely the object is to make things on screen look as real as possible - well, as real as zombies can be. Instead, you end up with jerky footage that just looks like a bad special effect. What's the point in spending all that money? Pathetic.

    Same with the Hulk film, it was absolutely shite, unwatchable, just a cartoon flying about the screen really quickly, too quickly to be absorbed by the viewer. Am I wrong, but was Lou Ferrigno, painted green, in slow motion, growling at the camera, a million times more "believable" than the CGI Hulk?

    Perhaps I'm too old, or perhaps these films look fucking stunning on the big screen, but they are doing my loaf in. I want to suspend my disbelief when I see a film - I watch Star Wars, and those Star Destroyers look like massive spaceships moving across the universe, I'm absorbed, I enjoy the ridiculous storyline, I can believe in it.
    Trying to watch these modern films, all I think is "this is giving me a headache", or "that person didn't move naturally" even though he is walking upside down on the ceiling.

    Fucking Conan the Barbarian, I ask you! It'll be SHIT, no two ways about it.

    Also just saw the trailer for Rise of the Planet of the Apes, but then again, it might be just footage of the London riots, he he.
    So I woke up,rolled over and who was lying next to me? Only Bonnie Langford!

    I nearly broke her back

  • #2
    I watch Star Wars, and those Star Destroyers look like massive spaceships moving across the universe, I'm absorbed, I enjoy the ridiculous storyline, I can believe in it.
    Trying to watch these modern films, all I think is "this is giving me a headache", or "that person didn't move naturally" even though he is walking upside down on the ceiling.
    I agree 100%. Star Wars (original) looks much more realistic than any CGI I've ever seen. Speaking of which, Lucas should be incarcerated for the crimes he's committed on his classic films.
    "Today, I shat a brown monolith ..majestic enough for gods to stand upon" BillZ aka horns666

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    • #3
      Conan's not out in the states yet either.

      I don't know about it, I really wanted The Rock the play Conan.
      Build a man a fire and he's warm for a day, set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.

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      • #4
        I dont know, CGI could have been a big help in the motion of the first Terminator, instead of that super jerky, stiff puppet they used. So help me god if they try to make that over again though.
        HTTP 404 - Signature Not Found

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        • #5
          I'm with Rsmacker! May be I'm getting too old!

          But I went with my 3 sons (12-14-16) to Cowboys & Aliens last weekend and we all enjoyed it! I put my brain to "off" when I enter the room and just enjoy the ride like in a roller-coaster.

          Now they want to go see Captain America...
          JB aka BenoA

          Clips and other tunes by BenoA / My Soundcloud page / My YouTube page
          Guitar And Sound (GAS) forum / Boss Katana Amps FB group

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          • #6
            Idk I do wanna see a remake of the highlander. Lol
            I'm going to give you the keys to the Lamborghini

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            • #7
              Usually i go into a movie expecting to be disappointed, sometimes come away surprised, but not often. Usually just have to look past the things that blow and accept it for what it is.
              Just saw Rise of the Planet of the Apes and it is not bad honestly, Ol Smeagol gives a great performance, i expect he will win an award for it and should.
              Still interested in Conan, looks like it could be alright. I never get my hopes up, but the scenery and costuming looks really good.
              Even tho the first Hulk CGI was atrocious, i still liked the movie, thought it was well done and had a good comic book feel to it.
              People have said the second one was better, but i haven't seen it.

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              • #8
                To slightly contradict my post, and beliefs, Sucker Punch is the best movie I've seen in a good while.
                "Today, I shat a brown monolith ..majestic enough for gods to stand upon" BillZ aka horns666

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                • #9
                  Sucker Punch was awful. A couple of 14 year olds were given daddy's chequebook to make a movie. It looked good, but beyond that, peh
                  Hail yesterday

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                  • #10
                    CGI looks fake because it is fake.

                    Some folks think that film budgets are ridiculously huge these days (a lot of it goes to lead actors and advertising), but they have no idea how much more it would cost to make an epic film where everything is real.
                    Still the most expensive film ever is "War and Peace" made in the 60's by Sergei Bondarchuk (some specialists have calculated that it would take about 600 million dollars to create it today). It took many years to film it, there's no copy and paste army scenes but hundreds of thousands of real people, the tailors had to make Imperial Russian uniforms for everyone etc. Just massive massive work.

                    But really who the fuck cares, the overwhelming majority of great influential films are made with rather small budgets except for something like Metropolis by Fritz Lang. Big budgets are usually for making poppycock rubbish.
                    Bo Widerberg and bunch of other Swedish hippies made "Elvira Madigan" in '67 which visually beats for example that turd Avatar (which cost at least thousand times more) in every single way.

                    The first real big budget-blockbuster Hollywood hot shot Cecil B. DeMille made shit loads of movies over a long period of time, perhaps only two are watchable. None of his flashy big budget studio crap is comparable to for example "Sweet Smell of Success" made by Burt Lancaster's small independent company, filmed mostly on locations in NYC.
                    Last edited by Endrik; 08-11-2011, 04:31 AM.
                    "There is nothing more fearful than imagination without taste" - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

                    "To be stupid, selfish and have good health are three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, all is lost" - Gustave Flaubert

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                    • #11
                      The first hulk movies sucked , the second was pretty good with ed norton. The Hulk is supposed to look that big. The TV Hulk really sucked. I just watched the ape movie and it's pretty good.
                      I don't think they should have redone Conan, but I'' give it a chance as long as it's not the original script redone. I liked Jason Momoa in Game of Thrones and Stargate Atlantis(I try to forget he was also in Batwatch).

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                      • #12
                        They have a tall skinny guy playing Conan. They had some small little goof playing Thor. Whats next, Mini-me as the new Superman?............

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                        • #13
                          some remakes are better though..I loved the remake of Dawn of the Dead....I'll get my coat...

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                          • #14
                            They have a tall skinny guy playing Conan
                            I don't think your gonna get much bigger than 6'4" and 230lbs
                            Arnold is 6' 2" and his competition weight was 240-250lbs with steriods.

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                            • #15
                              Mini-me as the new Superman?............
                              When have they ever picked a good superman.

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