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Originally posted by VitaminG
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GTWGITS! - RacerX -
Jack was riding a horse one day
Jack was having trouble dis-mounting the horse
Would you help Jack off the horse?Comment
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Calvin Rickson, an engineer from Texas A&M University, has designed a bra that keeps womens breasts from jiggling, bouncing up and down and prevents nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in.
After a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took Mr Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of him.Comment
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A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps liars, and decides to try it out at home. At the dinner table dad asks the son, "Where were you today?" Son, "At school." Robot slaps him, he says, "OK I was at Billys watching movies." Dad, "What did you watch?" Son, "Toy Story 3" Robot slaps him again, and he blurts out "It was a porno!" Dad screams at him, "When I was your age I didn't even know what porn was!" Robot slaps dad, mom starts laughing and says "Well, he IS your son!" and the robot slaps mom."illegal downloading saved people from having to buy that piece of shit you tried to pass off as music" - NighbatComment
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A young man and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town. They were about to have sex when the girl stopped.
"I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex." The man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing.
After a cigarette, the man just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window. "Why aren't we going anywhere?" asked the girl.
"Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I'm actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25...Enjoying a rum and coke, just didn't have any coke...Comment
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What a woman says...
This place is a mess! C'mon!
You and I need to clean up!
Your stuff is lying on the floor and
You'll have no clothes to wear if we
don't do laundry right now!
What a man hears...
blah blah blah blah blah C'MON!
YOU AND I blah blah blah blah!
blah blah blah blah ON THE FLOOR blah
blah blah NO CLOTHES blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah RIGHT NOW!Enjoying a rum and coke, just didn't have any coke...Comment
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Q. Why do men pay more for car insurance?
A. Women don't get blow jobs while they're driving
Q. What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
A. Gagged
Q. Why did the woman cross the road?
A. Never mind that, what the fuck is she doing out of the kitchen?Enjoying a rum and coke, just didn't have any coke...Comment
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What's red and has 7 dents?
Snow Whites cherry."illegal downloading saved people from having to buy that piece of shit you tried to pass off as music" - NighbatComment
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Q: If your old ladys watch is broken, do you fix it or buy a new one?Originally posted by Jayster View Post
A: Neither, theres a clock on the stove.
Q: What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
A: Nothing, you done told her twice.HTTP 404 - Signature Not FoundComment
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There is none. It was I who wiped my ass on your shower curtain.Originally posted by Twitch View Post
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"Artists should be free to spend their days mastering their craft so that working people can toil away in a more beautiful world."
- Ken MComment
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Q: Why do woman have such small feet?
A: So they can stand closer to the sink...Enjoying a rum and coke, just didn't have any coke...Comment
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Yeah, I actually got that one from Alf yeeeears ago.Originally posted by Axewielder View PostThere is none. It was I who wiped my ass on your shower curtain.HTTP 404 - Signature Not FoundComment
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why did cavemen drag their women around by the hair and not the feet?
so they wouldn't fill up with sand.Not helping the situation since 1965!Comment
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