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My boss is a nice guy, but...His church needed a lead player for the church band. Wanting more dough for vacation, I accepted the offer. Play 5 songs at 3 services, get paid $100. I was given a CD with 5 really sucky (but easy) songs. I had less than 48 hours to prepare. I learned them all, no problem. Then comes the gig. After being told not to bring any preamps, pedals, etc., I show up to find that they are plugging me straight into the board (No overdrive, no reverb, nothin'). So we start to run thru the songs, but something sounds weird. [img]/images/graemlins/brow.gif[/img]Could it be that they're playing in a different friggin' key?!?!? Why, yes they friggin' are!!! [img]/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img]So now I've pissed off the little prick with the acoustic (aka Minister of Music), so I'm taking scornful orders from him. There's another little bastard with some of those 'egg shaker' things and a tambourine trying to encourage me. It took about a minute and a half to learn the parts in the key everybody else was in, so all was well...........until the singers showed up. My position on the stage was to the rear left, standing on a small platform and unable to move. Somehow I ended up with the big'n (fat lady) and a funny-boy (wannabe lady) planted right in front of me. I could either look at the music stand with nothing on it, the fat lady's 350 lb. ass, or the queer's ass. Luckily, we played all 5 songs during the first 15 minizzles of the service and we were able to leave. Otherwise my eyesight would have surely perished. -SCOTT
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
AWESOME! [img]/images/graemlins/notworthy.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] My eyes are all misty from laughter. Hope it's ok to grin a bit? [img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img] -
Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
A few bands ago, our drummer was responsible for booking us in a small club in Minor Hill Tennessee (population 7 rednecks and a goat). We were told "Yeah, it's a rock club, we can just do our usual setlist." We show up/set up. By gig time all 7 rednecks are there cowboy hats and all, the goat is tied up in the parking lot in between a couple of pickup trucks. First song of the set: Back in Black. Stunned silence. Second song: The Ocean. Unhappy rumblings from the "crowd". Third song: Paranoid. "Bubba" yells "You fellers know any George Jones?"
I looked at the singer, he looked at the bass player, we ALL looked at the drummer. The owner says "We got some on the Jukebox"
Gig over.
Nice huh?Comment
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
That has saved me in a gig before by knowing george jones songs, I had basically the same expireance at gig and I was able to bust out some country tunes out of my ass.I've fallen, Fallen through. If I'm Not With you, All I wanna Do Is Feel blueComment
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
Yeh, i guess a little good came out of the church gig. If our "dummer" ever gets us a gig at a christian bar, and somebody yells out [img]/images/graemlins/headbang.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/headbang.gif[/img]"All Creatures Of Our God And King!" [img]/images/graemlins/headbang.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/headbang.gif[/img] I shall be ready.Comment
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
At least that's better than hearing "Play some skynard man" [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]I've fallen, Fallen through. If I'm Not With you, All I wanna Do Is Feel blueComment
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
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At least that's better than hearing "Play some skynard man" [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
[/ QUOTE ] Yeh! How come nobody ever says "Play some Morbid Angel" or sumpm like that? [img]/images/graemlins/scratchhead.gif[/img] -SCOTTComment
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
At one of my gigs in a very small club in Texas, it started raining like hell and the roof above the stage started leaking bad! The stage became soaked very quickly and we were soon playing while standing in water. During a break, we moved our equipment and effects pedals onto the floor below the stage and a drunk guy stepped on my pedals and knocked a mic stand over. [img]/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img] I pushed him and said a few choice words to him before the POWER WENT OUT. [img]/images/graemlins/eyes.gif[/img]
Oh yeah, then later I saw a hot girl walk by the stage and I suddenly forgot what the hell song I was playing. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]Comment
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
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At least that's better than hearing "Play some skynard man" [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
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I don't know, we probably could have pulled some Skynyrd out of our asses and gotten through it, but these folks wanted *COUNTRY* and we were ill equipped to satisfy 'em. Scary place to be. I was worried about our collective anal sanctitude. I didn't want to be "Ned Beatty" ya know?
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
A few years back, we were opening for Arch Enemy and Nevermore.
First, the show gets moved back aday 'cause a huge snowstorm clobbered the DC area. So that crowd sucks.
This turns out to be fortunate.
Our singer (the old one, not the current guy) had a bit of a cold, so we arranged to do a few things to help him out. (Have him drop out during choruses when all three of us would normally be singing, etc.)
He spends his line check doing, I kid you not, full-blown, top of his range, '80s metal vocal shrieks.
We get through the line check, and halfway through the first song, our singer completely loses all his high range. Since he refused to take voice - despite our urgings - and he refused to practice any variations of the songs, just in case, he now has NO idea what to do. So he tries to sing down an octave, and his misses EVERYTHING. It sounded like Danzig though an auto-tune set to "random".
It was horrific. The only time I've ever been glad a set was over.
MikeComment
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Re: What\'s y\'alls worst gig ever? Mine was last month.
mine would be the library show that stephan attended...no monitors and i was sick as hell...d.m.Comment
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