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  • Just call me a dumbass!

    Well, after being pissed off Friday eve about the my car and the fukk's at Jack Schmitt Caddy, and them not honoring their word. I went out, dropped the rest of my parts off at the Harley Dealer, bike's about done BTW.. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

    I go to the local meat market for happy hour, just gonna have a couple of beers, certainly wasn't dressed for the evening, anyway, I continue to have several cocktails with a new friend I just meet there, he sells licensing and clothes to Harley dealers, ( YES! Free samples comin my way! ) I take off downtown to meet a bud at his restaurant, on the way, some punk kids pull up next to me, acting like they want to race, some hot Camaro, so we proceeded to race down I-55, I smoked him bad, I look down, I'm doing 155 MPH ( new record for my car ) Anyway, toasted his ass, I get downtown, I'm sitting at a light with a Mustang SVT Cobra next to me, 3 people in the car, I juice it a little, they act like they want to race. So I say sure, I've stomped Mustangs before. The light turns green, I lit em up, hit second, go sideways a bit, I look back and there he his "trying" to stay with me, and all the sudden CHERRIES!!!!! I'm like FUKK!!!!!!

    There were two cops right behind me at the light, I couldn't see them cause I've got some pretty heavy tint on my car, they watched the whole thing, they let him go and pull me over I guess cause I smoked the Kiddies. Anyway, I get out of the car, yeh I know I should stay in, but anyway, I get out, and 2 of the most hottest cops known to man walk up, I couldn't help but flirt my ass off. She started yellin at me, asking about Hall Str ( Industrial district here in St. Louis used for stunt riding and drag racing ) how often I go, I say I've never been there to race, only to pass through, which is true, and she starts flirting back with me, all the while holding my license looking at it. I ask her if she wanted to search me or something. [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] She just started laughing at me and let me go!!!!!!!! She saw the car seats in the back of the car, and asked if I drove like a 12 yr old with my kids in the car and I said Oh HELL NO!

    Anyway, she turns and says have a nice evening Speedy!

    Man, someone was on my side that night! I felt like one of those dumbasses on the cop shows. It was classic tho and I did smoke the kiddies!

    It was certainly footage for The World's Dumbest drivers!

    Go ahead, flame away!

    Pat

  • #2
    Re: Just call me a dumbass!

    nice one, ya dumbass! [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

    (btw, get the officer's phone number?) [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
    Hail yesterday

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    • #3
      Re: Just call me a dumbass!

      [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] nope, didn't ask! But I am married tho. If I were ever to cheat on my wife, I'd certainly be handcuffed by either of those hotties! Man, they looked like they should be in Reno 9-11!!!

      Pat

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      • #4
        Re: Just call me a dumbass!

        Good thing they weren't militant lesbians - you'd be in the pokey for speeding AND sexual harassment [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

        Newc
        I want to depart this world the same way I arrived; screaming and covered in someone else's blood

        The most human thing we can do is comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.

        My Blog: http://newcenstein.com

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        • #5
          Re: Just call me a dumbass!

          You lucky ****.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Just call me a dumbass!

            [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]....

            Well Pat in my Vette I never get pulled over by anyone hot ...he he.

            But I get pulled over every damn time I take it out .. [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

            Like you I got tint on my windows.. the darkest availuable ...

            and my pipes are loud as hell...I like going under bridges..

            155 huh? ...wow I think you'd have me ...the top I had my car in the 13 years I've own it was 146 racing a newer stock Mustang Cobra GT...Left him at about 130+....on a nice long stretch..

            But I got my ass handed to me brutally by a Viper ....he spanked me bad...that bastage....I want one of those..

            well one time I was at a light next to a beefy new black TA ...he sounded good and I was good to go...so we're lookin' at each other and when I'm lookin' at the dude ...his face turns white and no longer has his game face on and kind of signaled with his eyes in a "oh oh " kind of way ...so I look to my right and there is a Parma cop standing two feet from my passenger window just smiling and shaking his finger saying ..."don't do it "...DOH!!!!

            I just looked at him and laughed and yelled to him "party pooper" ..he laughed and we had to just putt down the street like two old ladies....I hate when that happends...

            John and I was doing about 125 going down a main street side by side...putting on a show for people that's for sure....that was fun...that was years ago...he'd get me now with his new 'stang ...he's got that thing off the hook.

            It's sure a lot of fun ...I love it!!!

            but I did have a very hot partner who wanted to do me very badly ...she told me everything she likes to do in the sack everytime I worked with her ...sure made my day go by pretty fast ...

            but that didn't make anything easier with the wife with all of her blatant lust .....wife's can pick up on those signals man ....they have radar... [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

            Tempting though ...that cop is a freak in the sack ...man I always wondered...what if???? [img]/images/graemlins/scratchhead.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/eek.gif[/img]
            "Bill, Smoke a Bowl and Crank Van Halen I, Life is better when I do that"
            Donnie Swanstrom 01/25/06..miss ya!

            "Well, your friend would have Bell's Palsy, which is a facial paralysis, not "Balls Pelsy" like we're joking about here." Toejam's attempt at sensitivity.

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            • #7
              Re: Just call me a dumbass!

              Hehehe... Driving like a 12 year old! You da man Pat.

              What a great story though. Most cool. Chick cops can be the worst it seems... Shoulda got her number though!!!

              Myself, I had a run in with a pair of female coppers that came to answer a domestic violence call across the street from my house and somehow found their way into my back yard and proceeded to let my two dogs (one pitbull and one Rottweiler, that I had just let into the yard about two minutes before hand) out of my yard. Thank you officers!

              I only leave them alone a minute to turn on my computer and ran out in a panic when I saw immediately that they awere gone. I came out front to my pitbull Coby sitting in the front seat of the cop car wanting a ride and the cops seemed sorta upset, haha...

              The one was quite sweet to me and was playing with my pitbull once he came out of their car saying what a nice dog he was. The other manly-female copper was quite anti-male it seemed and proceeded to ream me out big time for having roaming dogs. Which I adamantly refuted saying that THEY had obviously unlocked a very very (diffucult to unlock )locked gate, or my dogs had miraculously grown oposing thumbs and raised their IQ quite a bit. Most humans can't unlock that gate dammit... Surprising that these two cops were able to actually.

              The dikey manly-female cop proceeded to write me 400 dollars in tickets on the dogs and told me I was lucky she hadn't just shot my dogs... The sweet one apologized saying that the other cop had issues.

              Interesting evening...

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              • #8
                Re: Just call me a dumbass!

                You should have taped the whole thing.
                You were VERY lucky.
                [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

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                • #9
                  Re: Just call me a dumbass!

                  well since you asked for it

                  dumbass! [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]
                  shawnlutz.com

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                  • #10
                    Re: Just call me a dumbass!

                    Drinking and Drag Racing? Sorry bro, yep, you're a dumbass.
                    Don't forget the corn. It's nutritious, delicious, and ribbed for her pleasure.

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                    • #11
                      Re: Just call me a dumbass!

                      Hey Jack, I certainly wasn't intoxicated by any means, I don't think I'd have walked away unscathed from those hotties if so. DUI's and prosecuting them around here is the primary cause of arrests, etc. So had I been drunk, I wouldn't have walked. I know my limits bro, trust me.

                      I wish the cops would have taped it, that'd have been cool, in a sick little way.

                      Pat

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                      • #12
                        Re: Just call me a dumbass!

                        DUMBASS!

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                        • #13
                          Re: Just call me a dumbass!

                          Well, I asked for it and certainly deserve it for that one! [img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

                          Pat

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                          • #14
                            Re: Just call me a dumbass!

                            I got pulled over one morning about 1:30 AM in the City of Orange, CA by a female cop. I was smoking a joint and a big cloud got out of the car with me when she ordered me out, to the back of the car, then on my stomach where she came up and cuffed me.

                            Turned out a guy in a smiliar car had just tossed a brick through a storefront about 3 blocks away. We waited while they checked out the other guy and someone ID'ed him as the brickman (Koo Koo Ka Choo!).

                            So she said, "SINCE you didn't give me any sh!t and cooperated perfectly, I'm no going to search your car, even though it and you reek of pot. I'm just going to tell you I'd better not catch you smoking pot in your car again."
                            She uncuffed me and told me to get lost.

                            She was a hot blonde, but there was no way I was flirting with her when she had the cuffs on me! Most LA cops don't care much about pot, but Orange and Garden Grove cops are a bit strict, so I was really lucky.

                            So I went home, parked, and smoked another joint!
                            Ron is the MAN!!!!

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                            • #15
                              Re: Just call me a dumbass!

                              Well, this happened in 1985 but it’s the most exciting story I have to tell. (yeah I know) anyway it’s the most scared I’ve ever been when pulled over by a cop and they weren’t chick cops either. I was 22 and they were big and scary!! LOL! …anyway, I had a 78 trans am bandit car I’d just rebuilt the engine in, and put on a 250hp nitrous system and a shift kit. I thought I was HOT DOG! Me and a buddy went out one Saturday night to line her up at the midnight drags and headed out to some back streets to try the ‘ol car out. After we left his house we ate about ½ oz each of some good freeze dried shrooms, by the time we got there we’d smoked a big ‘ol fatty, and had a case of beer in my back floorboard of which we’d polished off about 5. We made a couple of “practice runs” and were just about ready to head over to the strip when I saw the flashing lights. All I remember is the cops (2 of them) coming to each side of the car, shining their flashlights inside the car, and saying “what’a you boys doing?” My bro was in the pass. seat about to shake outa his pants, and I looked up at the cop on my side and said “sorry sir, we were just on our way to the strip and was trying out the car, I’m really sorry if we bothered anyone”. About that time I hear the cop on the other side of the car say “hmmmm….wait a minute…..” so I look over there and in the floor was an open pack of papers, a couple of empty baggies, and a bunch of rubbish, all in the light of his flashlight. (the **** fugging glowed man!!!!! DOH!!!! Then he shines his light in the back floor and sees the case of beer. He calmly says, hmmm….stems, seeds, papers, baggies, beer (as he’s shining the light on each item) and then he tells us to sit tight, give them our drivers licenses, and then both cops go back and sit in their car and get on the radio. We sat there for what seemed like 500 hours and then the driver cop comes back, gives us our licenses back, and says, you boys get on over to the drags, we don’t want to see you out here again. I swear I would have gave that dude a blowjob if he’d asked for it that night!!! LOLOLOLOL!!! Nowadays there’s no way I could get away with anything close to that.
                              …..and just to think….I still don’t believe in f’king god!!!!!
                              Oh and Pat, I was a dumbass once too!!!
                              My goal in life is to be the kind of asshole my wife thinks I am.

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