Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Metal Shakespeare

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Metal Shakespeare

    Power metal:
    The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love with her in an enchanted forest.

    Thrash metal:
    The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.

    Heavy metal:
    The protagonist arrives on a harley davidson bike, kills the dragon, drinks some beers and fucks the princess.

    Folk metal:
    The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordeons, violins, flutes and many more instruments, the dragon falls asleep (by all the dancing)... Then all leave... Without the princess…

    Viking metal:
    The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his migthy axe, cooks and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals the castle and burns all the place before he leaves.

    Death metal:
    The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.

    Black metal:
    The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle... Then sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her... Then he impales the unvirgen princess.

    Gore metal:
    The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in the front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her... Then he fucks the dead body, slashes her belly and eats her guts... Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.

    Doom metal:
    The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks that he never could beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide... The dragon eats his body and the princess as well... (the end of the sad story).

    Progressive metal:
    The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes... The dragon kills himself out of boredom... The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the technics and tunes learned in the last year of the conservatory... The princess escapes looking for the heavy metal protagonist.

    Glam metal:
    The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs of the guy's appearance and lets him enter... He then steals the princess' make-up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color.

    Grind metal:
    The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...

    [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

    I think it's mostly true.

    ATTENTION: this topic is not about to hurt someone's feelings about his musical orientation in any way! It's just delightful stuff. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

  • #2
    Re: Metal Shakespeare

    Er, I think this was posted before actually, or maybe that was another board..hmm.

    Anywy, I love that, it's pretty damn funny, and suprisingly true.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Metal Shakespeare

      You sure? I'm not a frequent reader here :/

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Metal Shakespeare

        [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Metal Shakespeare



          HA HA! Even the newbie corrected you! [img]/images/graemlins/fart.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]
          "Quiet, numbskulls, I'm broadcasting!" -Moe Howard, "Micro-Phonies" (1945)

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Metal Shakespeare

            [ QUOTE ]
            Progressive metal:
            The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes... The dragon kills himself out of boredom... The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the technics and tunes learned in the last year of the conservatory... The princess escapes looking for the heavy metal protagonist.

            [/ QUOTE ]

            [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]
            You took too much, man. Too much. Too much.

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Metal Shakespeare

              Buahahahaha, Ron. Do you know everything what happened yesterday?

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Metal Shakespeare

                Yeah, and I know to search before posting something here (especially something "metal" and "funny") Mr "You sure? I'm not a frequent reader here :/ " [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]
                "Quiet, numbskulls, I'm broadcasting!" -Moe Howard, "Micro-Phonies" (1945)

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Metal Shakespeare

                  Do you always make fun just of other people? You should start looking at yourself ... Maybe you will realise how pathetic you're becoming.

                  Comment

                  Working...
                  X