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Re: Step-Daughter\'s Cell Phone
As Kevin stated, your kids are not your friends. They are your kids.
They NEED authority figures, and they NEED to learn to accept you as the authority, the "know-it-all", and The Boss. She forfeited her privacy when she blew off your trust and ignored your authority by sneaking out.
While a cel phone is a handy accessory, there should be strict usage limits. Go over the minutes one month, you lose it for one month. Treat it like money - once it's gone, it's gone until next payday. If you are overdrawn (cash or minutes), you can't use it for 30 days (next payday) unless in emergencies (and define emergencies as injury and the like, not "oh my god this really cute guy is sitting across the cafe from me and I don't know what to say to him" or "is it ok to wear this top with these jeans?" and such as that)
You can let her have her way and put up with whatever trouble she brings with her and HOPE she turns out to be a responsible adult, or you can teach her to be a responsible adult today. If she wants to be treated like an adult, she has to act like a RESPONSIBLE adult, not just "adult" in terms of "being the legal age of consent to do whatever they wish without asking permission".
"Adult" means Grown Up, Mature (MENTALLY, not just lactating tits and ovulation), and Responsible; not 18+ years of age.
It's often been misreported that girls mature faster than boys. The whole truth to this is that females mature *physically* in terms of body devlopment (i.e. breasts produce milk) and the ability to bear children by the ages of 10-12 years, whereas most males cannot produce strong enough sperm to properly fertilize an egg until they are 15+ years, though they can produce defective sperm earlier that results in defective or stillborn children if it hits a weak enough egg.
As Kevin stated, your kids are not your friends. They are your kids.
They NEED authority figures, and they NEED to learn to accept you as the authority, the "know-it-all", and The Boss. She forfeited her privacy when she blew off your trust and ignored your authority by sneaking out.
While a cel phone is a handy accessory, there should be strict usage limits. Go over the minutes one month, you lose it for one month. Treat it like money - once it's gone, it's gone until next payday. If you are overdrawn (cash or minutes), you can't use it for 30 days (next payday) unless in emergencies (and define emergencies as injury and the like, not "oh my god this really cute guy is sitting across the cafe from me and I don't know what to say to him" or "is it ok to wear this top with these jeans?" and such as that)
You can let her have her way and put up with whatever trouble she brings with her and HOPE she turns out to be a responsible adult, or you can teach her to be a responsible adult today. If she wants to be treated like an adult, she has to act like a RESPONSIBLE adult, not just "adult" in terms of "being the legal age of consent to do whatever they wish without asking permission".
"Adult" means Grown Up, Mature (MENTALLY, not just lactating tits and ovulation), and Responsible; not 18+ years of age.
It's often been misreported that girls mature faster than boys. The whole truth to this is that females mature *physically* in terms of body devlopment (i.e. breasts produce milk) and the ability to bear children by the ages of 10-12 years, whereas most males cannot produce strong enough sperm to properly fertilize an egg until they are 15+ years, though they can produce defective sperm earlier that results in defective or stillborn children if it hits a weak enough egg.
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