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Jokes for the Chat Room

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  • #16
    Re: Jokes for the Chat Room

    Carl is da man!!
    [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

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    • #17
      Re: Jokes for the Chat Room

      Hey I can not help it that I am all refined and stuff [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] I am insulted....and your all out of the Trembling Clowns [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]....Ok your all back in see you tonight

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      • #18
        Re: Jokes for the Chat Room

        Snobby Em and her crystal: "Tiiiiiing!"

        Great joke! [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

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        • #19
          Re: Jokes for the Chat Room

          [ QUOTE ]
          Hey I can not help it that I am all refined and stuff [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] I am insulted....and your all out of the Trembling Clowns [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]....Ok your all back in see you tonight

          [/ QUOTE ]

          <font color="aqua"> [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/toast.gif[/img] </font>
          Dave ->

          "would someone answer that damn phone?!?!"

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          • #20
            Re: Jokes for the Chat Room

            Voila



            dumbass

            [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]
            "Quiet, numbskulls, I'm broadcasting!" -Moe Howard, "Micro-Phonies" (1945)

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            • #21
              Re: Jokes for the Chat Room

              A little boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, "Where`s Mom and dad?"

              and she replied, "they`re up in bed."

              The little boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he came back in for lunch and asked his grandma "where`s Mom and Dad?"

              and she replied "they`re still up in bed."

              Again the little boy started to giggle and he ate his lunch and went out to play. Then the little boy came in for dinner and once again he asked his grandma "where`s Mom and dad?"

              and his grandmother replied "they`re still up in bed."

              The little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, "whats so funny? Every time I tell you they`re still up in bed you start to laugh! what is going on here?"

              The little boy replied, "well last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue."

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              • #22
                Re: Jokes for the Chat Room

                [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

                Another good one. [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

                See ya tonight.
                [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

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                • #23
                  Re: Jokes for the Chat Room

                  A hippie gets on a bus and spies a pretty young nun. He sits down next to her, and asks her: 'Can we have sex?'

                  'No,' she replies, 'I'm married to God.' She stands up, and gets off at the next stop.

                  The bus driver, who overheard, turns to the hippie and says: 'I can tell you how to get to have sex with her!'

                  'Yeah?', says the hippie.

                  'Yeah!', say the bus driver. 'She goes to the cemetery every Tuesday night at midnight to pray. So all you have to do it dress up in a robe with a hood, put some of that luminous powder stuff in your beard, and pop up in the cemetery claiming to be God.'

                  The hippie decides to give it a try, and arrives in the cemetery dressed as suggested on the next Tuesday night.

                  'I am God,' he declares to the nun, keeping the hood low about his face.

                  'Have sex with me.' The nun agrees without question, but begs him to restrict himself to anal sex, as she is desperate not to lose her virginity.

                  'God' agrees, and promptly has his wicked way with her. As he finishes, he jumps up and throws back his hood with a flourish.

                  'Ha-ha,' he cries. 'I am the hippie!'
                  'Ha-ha,' cries the nun. "I am the bus driver "

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                  • #24
                    Re: Jokes for the Chat Room

                    Hey where have you been?
                    I didn't see you in the chat room last night... you wanker!
                    [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

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                    • #25
                      NEW Jokes for the Chat Room

                      AMERICAN WOMEN:

                      First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
                      Second date: You get to grope all over and make out.
                      Third date: You get to have sex but only in the missionary position.



                      IRISH WOMEN:

                      First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
                      Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
                      20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex.


                      ITALIAN WOMEN:

                      First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
                      Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti & meatballs.
                      Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3-carat ring.
                      5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of having sex.
                      6th Anniversary: You find yourself a girlfriend.




                      JEWISH WOMEN:

                      First Date: You get dynamite head.
                      Second Date: You get more great head.
                      Third Date: You tell her you'll marry her and never get head again.




                      CHINESE / PHILIPPINE WOMEN:

                      First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
                      Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Nothing happens again.
                      Third date: You don't even get to the third date and you've already realized nothing is ever going to happen.




                      INDIAN WOMEN:

                      First date: Meet her parents.
                      Second date: Set the date of the wedding.
                      Third date: Wedding night.


                      AFRICAN WOMEN:

                      First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
                      Second Date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner.
                      Third Date: You get to pay her rent.
                      Tenth Date: She's pregnant by someone other than you.


                      MEXICAN WOMEN:

                      First Date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Tequila, and have sex in the back of her car.
                      Second Date: She's pregnant.
                      Third Date: She moves in. One week later, her mother, father, his girlfriend, her two sisters, her brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her father's girlfriend's mother, her two cousins, her sister's Boyfriend and his three kids move in and you live on rice and beans for the rest of your life in your home that used to be nice, but now looks like a home along the Rio Grande


                      ARAB WOMEN:

                      First Date: Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles, friends and entire Arab community finds out.
                      Second Date: The guy is shot dead.

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