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Sup? [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
some things to ponder shared by a few friends [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
2. A day without sunshine is like...night.
3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
4. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
5. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
7. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
8. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
9. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the
cheese in the trap.
10. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
11. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
12. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
13. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
14. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
15. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
16. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
18. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
19. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
20. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
21. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
22. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
23. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
24. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what
happened.
25. Just remember - if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
26. Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
27. Life isn't like a box of chocolates... it's more like a jar of
jalapenos. What you do today might burn your butt tomorrow.
28. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
29. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.
30. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
31. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
32. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
33. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
34. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
35. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
36. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. T each him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
137. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
38. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
39. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.
40. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
41. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
42. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
43. Duct tape is like 'The Force,' It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
44. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
45. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
46. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
47. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
48. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
MOSH ON
DAVE
some things to ponder shared by a few friends [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
2. A day without sunshine is like...night.
3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
4. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
5. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
7. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
8. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
9. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the
cheese in the trap.
10. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
11. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
12. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
13. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
14. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
15. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
16. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
18. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
19. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
20. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
21. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
22. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
23. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
24. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what
happened.
25. Just remember - if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
26. Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
27. Life isn't like a box of chocolates... it's more like a jar of
jalapenos. What you do today might burn your butt tomorrow.
28. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
29. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.
30. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
31. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
32. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
33. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
34. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
35. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
36. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. T each him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
137. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
38. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
39. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.
40. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
41. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
42. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
43. Duct tape is like 'The Force,' It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
44. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
45. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
46. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
47. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
48. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
MOSH ON
DAVE
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