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Dear Tech Support.......

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  • Dear Tech Support.......

    <font color="yellow"> Dear Tech Support:

    Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed
    that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a
    lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed
    itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system
    activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting
    and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6
    I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run
    my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend
    7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

    Thanks,
    A Troubled User. </font>
    ______________________________________

    REPLY:
    <font color="blue">
    Dear Troubled User:

    This is a very common problem that men complain about.

    Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it
    is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an

    OPERATING SYSTEM

    and is designed by its Creator to run

    EVERYTHING!!!

    It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is
    impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system
    once installed.

    You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not
    allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child
    Support. I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the
    situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to
    alleviate software augmentation.

    The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because
    ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system
    will return to normal anyway.
    Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance.
    Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep
    3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

    However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will
    cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens,
    the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase
    additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !
    WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short
    Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause
    irreversible damage to the operating system.

    Best of luck,
    Tech Support </font>


    [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
    MOSH ON
    DAVE
    "It's because the speed of light is superior to the speed of sound that so many people look shiny before they actually sound stupid"

    "All pleasure comes at someone Else's expense"

    The internet is where, The men are men, the women are men, and the children are FBI agents.

  • #2
    Re: Dear Tech Support.......

    [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Dear Tech Support.......

      [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Dear Tech Support.......

        hahahahaha too funny.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Dear Tech Support.......

          [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

          Being a SA, i just sent this to about 20 of my coworkers and there was a sudden burst of laughter from my area [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]
          Look Up...Get Up...And Never EVER Give Up...

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          • #6
            Re: Dear Tech Support.......

            That's actually one of the first and the best email jokes that was floating around 10 years or so ago.

            Matt

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