Life's been good...

[Big D]

Re: Life\'s been good...

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Caught my bro with his wang in a vaccum cleaner, wow that was weird.


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Now THERE is something you dont hear everyday!!! [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

WOW, I damn near fell off my chair when I read that. Thats just TOOO funny!! I imagine the look on his face was priceless. SO, what the hell was he doing with his wang in a vacuum??? Did he really think that it would do the "trick" for him? [img]/images/graemlins/what.gif[/img]

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I guess he thought the "blowjob" would be good. He was like 12 at the time, it was rather awkward as you might imagine. And then oddly enough, he came out of the closet when he was like 25. Yep, my brother is a gay homosexual [img]/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]

Morale of the story, vacuum cleaner head (apparently) makes you gay.

[VitaminG]

Re: Life\'s been good...

wow, that sucks.....

[tedgar]

Re: Life\'s been good...

Yum. Weed. Haha, nice story ace. Livin' the dream!

[Endrik]

Re: Life\'s been good...

ahaa, I've had my dick in vacuum cleaner too, but it didn't do what I expected [img]/images/graemlins/eyes.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] and hey I'm not gay either [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

as for Tonemonster's request, here is the milf story.

Ok, the easiest way to ge laid is to go to some club where are some 40's and older single women. The scheme is first you ask one of them to dance, then you talk to her a little bit, then you go to some place where is a bed and fuck. That works 99% PERIOD.
I don't really do that, because I usually make out with young foxy chicks.
But the singer and the drummer from my last band always hit on those older women, specially the singer, to get laid very easily. He doesn't give a shit if the woman is hot or ugly, he fucks everything wich has a pussy. Absolutely everyone describes the singer with these words "He fucks some random bitches all the time". Anyway the singer and the drummer told me to that I should do the same thing sometimes.

Ok, one day I had no money and didn't have had sex for 5 days, I was dying. Without the money I couldn't go to some fancy nightclub and buy drinks for hotties and start my usual sweet talk to get laid.
So I went to this smaller place where I got in for free because I knew the doorman. There were about 15 fourty year old women. I seeked the most attractive one and asked her to dance (she looked pretty fine unlike some of the others). As soon as we started dancing some of the those women came along. After 10 minutes, they started pushing each other to get closer to me, suddenly things got way out of hands and the big catfight started. It was the most hilarious thing I've ever seen, women beating each other with legs, bags and a chair [img]/images/graemlins/eek.gif[/img] Security came and threw most of them out. After a while when everyone calmed down, I still wanted to get laid. So I talked my object in and we went to her place. As soon as we got to bed, her daughter (she was 16,17,18 or something) came home and freaked out.
She said to her mother "you never want me to go out with boys, but you are in bed with somone who's young enough to be your son"
The milf said "I'm a grown up woman, I do whatever I want to".
The daughter said "If you have sex with him, then I'll take him too"
I said "It's fine with me".
The milf freaked out and told me to get out, and they started yelling at each other. I got the fuck of that lunatic asylum but the yelling was so loud that I heard it outside.
I was so fucking pissed.
I went back to the club, because I was so fucking horny.
But they started closing, there were a couple of people left.
But there was this hot waitress (about 25-30) and asked what happened before. So I told her the story. She said that old women aren't good for anything.
After everyone left and the main entrance was closed, we kept talking. A little bit later we did IT on the bar [img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

[tonemonster]

Re: Life\'s been good...

Awesome Story Endrik!!!! [img]/images/graemlins/headbang.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/headbang.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/toast.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/band.gif[/img]

Got any other good ones to share?? [img]/images/graemlins/popcorn.gif[/img]

How bout anyone else? [img]/images/graemlins/popcorn.gif[/img]

Tone

[MBreinin]

Re: Life\'s been good...

Again, I say...I MUST GO VISIT ENDRIK IN ESTONIA!!!!!!!!!!!

And Big D, this is one of the funniest things I have heard in a while:

"Morale of the story, vacuum cleaner head (apparently) makes you gay."

Mike

[Endrik]

Re: Life\'s been good...

Tone, yeah I got plenty of them [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
maybe some other time, I'm pretty busy now.

Mike, you are always welcomed here

[toejam]

Re: Life\'s been good...

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Morale of the story, vacuum cleaner head (apparently) makes you gay.

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Hmm, I would have said it was the sheep out there in Iowa that made you gay. [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] j/k [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

[Big D]

Re: Life\'s been good...

[ QUOTE ]
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Morale of the story, vacuum cleaner head (apparently) makes you gay.

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Hmm, I would have said it was the sheep out there in Iowa that made you gay. [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] j/k [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

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Sheep don't make men gay, they make you horny...well that's what I've heard.

Anyway, we actually don't have that many sheep here, but we have lots of cows and pigs. I worked on a pig farm for a year after high school. It didn't make me gay, but I must admit I did find myself admiring the female pigs now and then.

So now, Ace's thread has completely gone to shit. It started out talking about smoking weed and sleeping with hot chicks. Now we're discussing the merits of animal lust in Iowa.

I guess this is why I keep coming back to JCF day after day....never know what you're gonna get.

[toejam]

Re: Life\'s been good...

Yeah, we're a little off the wall here. [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] Now, where's my bong?!?

[tonemonster]

Re: Life\'s been good...

Well, whenever you get in the typing mood again Endrik tell us some more of your adventures. [img]/images/graemlins/toast.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/popcorn.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/popcorn.gif[/img]

[Ace]

Re: Life\'s been good...

Well, I'm out of weed right now, but I do have a date with the drummer girl(my first choice, the one girl I would actually commit to right now) for the Nile show tonight. And she me to her show tomorrow night. And an after party!!!

[img]/images/graemlins/headbang.gif[/img]

[tonemonster]

Re: Life\'s been good...

Rock on Ace! Keep us posted! maybe you can invite the porn girl along and have ALOT of fun [img]/images/graemlins/headbang.gif[/img]

[tedgar]

Re: Life\'s been good...

Nothing's fun without weed though Tone! Just kidding, have fun, look good, get laid. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[mm2002]

Re: Life\'s been good...

My wife came home one night and caught me looking at a dirty picture on the internet.......man did I have some explaining to do. I'm pretty wild like that though.