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Sometimes you can plan things, and sometimes they go just as you would like them, and other times you can prepare, but nothing finally makes the reality of a situaion bear more to heart then when you're in the middle of it.
At approximately 6:30am Tuesday morning, I was at the hospital holding my mother as she passed away from my life, away from the years of suffering and existance she took upon herself as to make sure I was not alone in life.
I'm glad I can tell you all that I am taking this very well, but I cannot impart the fact that she was a wonderful and selfless person who I had the privelidge of being with until the very end. The last 6 of my years of my life, since my father passed away were dedicated to making sure she was comfortable, and to make sure that she had care when she needed it.
Most of her friends called her Suzy and most of them have already passed. She liked to play blackjack and slots, though she hadn't been gambling in over a decade. She didn't have any friends left, and I was the only one there to take care of her. She was so sweet and cute, even the nurses in the hospital adored her. She didn't understand english well, but never let it bother her.
In the end, she determined that she did not want critical life support and she refused further medical treatment, though she left the final decision up to me, I could not bear to see her suffer any more. I knew she was tired and only held onto life for my sake for the past couple of years, and I knew what she had wanted. Her life was being forced and as soon as I told them to make her comfortable, she sank back into the bed relaxed and I held her. She continued to hold on until I told her that I was there for her and it was alright for her to go. She passed about 15 minutes later.
She was the most selfless and wonderful person I have ever known. She was so strong and never complained about her pain and suffering, even though you could see it in her eyes. Since my father passed, my only fear in life was that I would not be there for when it mattered the most. I was there for her, and no matter how mentally prepared I was for it, being there was overwhelming. I love my mother so much and miss her. She'll be in my thoughts forever.
Rest in peace. I love you mom.
At approximately 6:30am Tuesday morning, I was at the hospital holding my mother as she passed away from my life, away from the years of suffering and existance she took upon herself as to make sure I was not alone in life.
I'm glad I can tell you all that I am taking this very well, but I cannot impart the fact that she was a wonderful and selfless person who I had the privelidge of being with until the very end. The last 6 of my years of my life, since my father passed away were dedicated to making sure she was comfortable, and to make sure that she had care when she needed it.
Most of her friends called her Suzy and most of them have already passed. She liked to play blackjack and slots, though she hadn't been gambling in over a decade. She didn't have any friends left, and I was the only one there to take care of her. She was so sweet and cute, even the nurses in the hospital adored her. She didn't understand english well, but never let it bother her.
In the end, she determined that she did not want critical life support and she refused further medical treatment, though she left the final decision up to me, I could not bear to see her suffer any more. I knew she was tired and only held onto life for my sake for the past couple of years, and I knew what she had wanted. Her life was being forced and as soon as I told them to make her comfortable, she sank back into the bed relaxed and I held her. She continued to hold on until I told her that I was there for her and it was alright for her to go. She passed about 15 minutes later.
She was the most selfless and wonderful person I have ever known. She was so strong and never complained about her pain and suffering, even though you could see it in her eyes. Since my father passed, my only fear in life was that I would not be there for when it mattered the most. I was there for her, and no matter how mentally prepared I was for it, being there was overwhelming. I love my mother so much and miss her. She'll be in my thoughts forever.
Rest in peace. I love you mom.
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