7 year old wants to play guitar advice sought, kinda long

[beaner]

7, almost 8 year old son is taking piano lessons. He started while in kindergarten and really liked it. He's an attention monger and loves playing in front of people, singing, dancing, making up his own songs and lyrics on the fly (he's really good at that). His piano playing hasn't caught up to the music in his head though, and he wants to quit playing any instrument. It took some talking but I finally got some info out of him, and in a nutshell, he wants a guitar, but doesn't want to take guitar lessons (or continue piano lessons). He also said that he was no good, which isn't the case, but I can see that from his 7 year old point of view since he can't play the music he wants to play.

I have some ideas about this. He has really gotten into my old rock music this past year (ozzy, Dokken, Ratt, typical late 80s stuff). His piano lessons just aren't holding his interest, and it's tough to get him to practice. I think he's convinced that guitar lessons will just be more of the same.

I'm not sure what to do. I don't have the patience to teach him guitar. Sad but true, and I suck anyway. His mom made the rule, and I bought into it, that he had to learn piano before moving to guitar. So far I would say that's a good thing, but when you start as young as he did, they really don't teach much theory or scales. It's all about gaining hand eye coordination, learning the keys, and the little black dots. I looked in his theory book and they are just now, like in the next 2-3 weeks going to start on sclaes and a 3 note chord. It seems to me that this is stuff I want him to learn since he's already comfortable with the keyboard, so I don't want him to stop lessons now.

I want to get him a guitar for xmas, but not sure about that yet either.

Any good advice out there? I don't want him to dislike playing by forcing him. I want to keep his interest up. I want him to want to play, and don't know how to motivate. ????

Thanks
Dave

[Grandturk]

I don't know squat about raising kids, but I do know that I wish I had starting playing when I was that age, rather than when I did at 16. I would be so much better.

I think you have to go with what he's interested in - how about this - make him keep up with the piano stuff, and under that condition, get him a guitar. If he learns scales and theory on piano, all he'll need is a little direction on the guitar to get going, which you should be able to provide him.

[Thrust]

I'm not sure how much advice I can offer but I can tell you about my experience when I started taking guitar lessons at 11/12 years of age. Sweet Child O' Mine just popped up and I literally "wanted to be" Slash (except for I ended up w/ a Clapton Strat). My Mom & Dad always stood behind pretty much anything I wanted to do and they were really supportive of me wanting to play guitar and they weren't apprehensive about dropping some $'s on buying me a nice guitar. However, my Dad had it in his mind that you "had to" start on an acoustic before "advancing" to electric. Okay, no biggie I'll start on acoustic if that's is the norm. So, my Dad goes out and purchases a 1978 Martin D-18 for me to start on. The guitar was HORRIBLE (okay, it sounded incredible but not like Slash). At this time they also took me to the local guitar store (I grew up in rural area) and got me started on lessons. All was cool except my "guitar" teacher was a "mandolin" freak and was convinced that teaching me open chords and "marry had a little lamb" was the basic foundations of playing. Again, not the road I had expected to travel on my journey of becoming "Slash jr." Well, now I had convined my parents that my progress was being impeded due to improper equipment and I needed an "electric guitar". So, my Dad and I go and trade in that killer Martin (oh such a mistake in hindsight) on a Fender USA Stat Plus. Now, once again my parents dropped some $'s on helping me progress at playing what I wanted to but my Dad didn't realize that an amplifier was also a critical component of that "rock" sound. So, after spending however much on the Strat we head WAY up some hollow to an old man's house to look at his OLD guitar amp. It was a no-name, tweed covered, SS that had NO distortion tone at all (although the cleans were actually pretty good). So, I think we ended up giving the guy $35 for the amp and this was to be my "rig" for the next 12 years.

You guessed it. I was never able to progress playing what I actually "wanted" to play so I quit for 12 years. Had my guitar instructor even taught me "Smoke on the Water" or "Iron Man" I would have been overjoyed, but instead I just assumed that one couldn't learn by playing what they wanted to play before learning all the other crap, so I gave up.

Moral of the story, support your kid in what "he" wants to do and help him on his terms. The joy he gets out of playing will manifest itself into his "needing" to learn theory to progress in areas that he wishes to improve. He's 7 and has PLENTY of time to figure out "the basics".

[~K~]

Ok couple of key things ..

I started out at that age as a keyboard player. It's good for him to keep it up on many different levels. Theory and coordination are huge.. It will be much easier for him to hop over to guitar this way .. Piano requires your brain to think indivually at what each hand is doing so it helps later with adaptiong to guitar ...

I started out playing keyboard for 2 years (I did public recitals and shit) and as I got into my early teens it just wasn't a cool instrument.. but it helped me learn the guitar.. I never really got into the whole lesson thing for the guitar I just learned it based off of what I already knew

Lastly~ lessons.. A big band player I knoew told me something years ago. My daughter wanted to learn guitar and we used to talk music all the time. He told me never to teach your own kids..

It's too stressful for the kids and the parents. You expect too much from them when you teach them and it stresses them out.. the stress makes it not be much fun for them ... in the end it has to be fun or they lose interest

[StukaJU87]

Dave,
I understand where you are coming from. It is frustrating to watch a child have to practice something that he does not like anymore. Maybe lessons are not for him. Maybe just get him a guitar and let him pick it up on his own. Show him some basic stuff.

My parents paid for 9 years of private drum lessons for me starting at 5 years old. Like a light switch, I wanted to play guitar and give up drums. My father sold all my drum stuff and refused to pay for any guitar related things.

I couldn't blame him. He was right. I practiced on my mothers old Silvertone. I saved my paper route money and bought my own guitar and tought myself to play from a KISS song book with the chord pictures and by watching other players and the videos on Video Jukebox and MTV and stuff.

Just try to encourage him but don't force anything on him. Let him jam with you and he will probably pick up pretty quick.

[beaner]

Thanks guys. I have no experience with this either since my parents fed me the "you'll never stick with it" line everytime I asked to play a musical instrument. I didn't get anything until I was much older.

I guess I'll talk to him a little more tonight. And maybe start picking things out of his lesson that relate to guitar too. Like the whole step whole step half step stuff that he's doing this week. Maybe then he'll see that the lessons are going somewhere without me actually trying to teach him.

Then I could just let him noodle around on my guitar too.

[lerxstcat]

Maybe use the guitar as a reward for keeping up with the piano lessons. The piano lessons can be the "work" and the guitar can be the "play". Look around and see if you can find a music store with a rock teacher who is more geared towards pattern and songs than theory. Explain to the teacher what your plan is and see if he or she is cool with that. Or, get him some basic beginner rock guitar DVDs and let him go through those at his own pace. I got one for my nephew about 8 years ago, it was Tom Kolb who's an MI instructor, and was pleasantly surprised at how much it had for starting out. I got mine at McCabe's in Santa Monica but you could look on Ebay and probably get some good materials for cheap. Maybe you and your son could even do the lessons together, it'd probably be good review for you and it'd be a father-son activity.

[danastas]

Now, I had an excellent teacher when I started out, but that was just luck. He's actually now one of the RockHouse method guys, but back then he was a 22 year old guy with an amp in his basement. I was the only one of my guitar player friends that had lessons.

All the others simply jumped in right away by learning songs. The guitar is pretty amazing that way. You can learn a song through simple repetition, even though you couldn't play anything else. My younger brother spent hours on my guitar for a couple weeks and he read my tabs for Black Dog. The next thing I know, he could play Black Dog, but if I said to him, Hey let's play this Ramones song, he'd be incapable. He'd need a couple weeks to do it. The moral is, let him follow his own interests. Let him be the next Slash, and eventually he might become interested in doing the things that build up his skills.

[Shawn Lutz]

I disagree Kev with what the big band dude says about teaching your own children. I think it really depends on the relationship you have with your children. Sure if you take a drill sergent approach to teaching then your not going to get results or have it be enjoyable for eithr oone of you.

I say get him a guitar for Christmas. I bought a couple of those Ibanez starter packs for my 2 sons from Matts Music a couple years ago. They include the guitar, amp, tuner, dvd etc. The guitar isn't cheap enough that its difficlt to play, actually they play pretty nice. I don't push them into learning anything or taking lessons from me or anyone. I showed them some basic stuff and htey just make a bunch of noise and make up their own shit They are at the age (5th and 7th grades) that guitar isn't a priority for them, too many other things..sports, playing outside with theiir buddies, x-box, internet etc that they'd rather be doing. I figure once my oldest gets pubes he'll have interest to want to devote time to learning it They know I'm ready to help them whenever THEY feel they are ready, only thye will know it and I'm not forcing guitar on them. I force enough on them in their school work.

I was the same way growng up...I had guitars since I was 5 or 6. My brothers had guitars too. I was more into sports than anything. In Junior high I started getting interested again and was able to figure out songs and 5 chord rhythms. I got bored with it because I wanted an electric. I got one for Christmas when I was 17...been a guitar junky ever since

[Emthrax]

Buy him a guitar.
Take him to the music store and let him handle lots of guitars, acoustics and electrics. Let him choose. Be excited with him!
Expose him to many genres of music.
Jam with him.
Just make stuff up or show him how to play "Smoke On The Water".

You could encourage him to keep up with piano, maybe make a deal that he keeps up with piano and he can do whatever he wants with guitar. Maybe he'll want to trade piano lessons for guitar lessons?

Music comes from within and it sounds like he already has amazing potential. You can learn theory and scales until you're blue in the face and know nothing about music, but at the same time, if you learn it you'll understand it.
The LOVE has to be there, and the DESIRE has to be there. Don't kill it by forcing it. Make lessons available, or books, or whatever. But also make the instrument available, and music available to inspire.

Parents are the BEST teachers! The first teachers! YAY!
You can teach your kids a ton of stuff without actually sitting them down and showing them every little thing and standing over their shoulder. Give your child what he needs and let him run with it.
Your love of music and playing alone can do wonders, this is an excellent opportunity to develop a musical bond with your son that is priceless.
Maybe it sounds cheesy, but it's true.

Good luck!

[Emthrax]

Moral of the story, support your kid in what "he" wants to do and help him on his terms. The joy he gets out of playing will manifest itself into his "needing" to learn theory to progress in areas that he wishes to improve. He's 7 and has PLENTY of time to figure out "the basics".

YES!!!

[mm2002]

YES!!!

+1