It's Enough to strangle a B$tch

[Drake S.]

So here is how this breaks down after 7 years of Divorce & 12 years with this woman, she tells me last night why didn't I stay & fight it out with her, we could've worked it out she's tired of dealing with the jerks in Miami Blah Blah Blah & this is all my fault that she's alone & can't find a good Man.

Let me inform you You had a good man! is what I tell her & she made the decision to divorce me I fought our divorce for 3 years made every effort to go to councelling Live in seperate rooms change jobs endless amounts of fighting debateing working thru the drudge of Bullshit! I have Pined over her for the last almost 7 years since , & am just starting to relive my own life again at 35 & she drops this pile os steaming shite on my lap after 7 years of making peace with her for our sons sake. Sorry if I offend the woman of this board , but right now I'ld like nothing more than to Spit in her face! I have never or will ever raise my hand to a woman, when we were together I never yelled at her or cursed when speaking to her even in argument, But C'mon AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGG!
I don't know maybe I'm going off a bit here, & there is obviously alot more to this story But I have been thru hell with this woman, She left me broken for along time! & personaly I don't think she deserves me or the sweat off my man Sack (that was for Billz my hero)

[Emthrax]

Chuk,
We've been pals for a few years now and I've come to know something of your character. Any woman would be lucky to have a guy like you in her life! I know your feelings about honor and respect, they are most admirable my friend, and I know some of the sacrifices you've made and just how much this has all meant to you. You are a fantastic father and I know you've busted your ass to make this work.
I'm sorry that you are going through this. I really am. I can't imagine how frustrating this must be for you!
I know it sucks right now, keep going bro.

Luv,
Em

[Drake S.]

Em you have no Idea how angry I was to hear something like that come out of her mouth I threw my Wha pedal thru my bedroom window , Yeah I had a melt down last night for sure.
The Wha survived by the way:ROTF: I gotta replace the window today

[Emthrax]

I hardly blame you. Throwing things feels so damn good when you're angry! HAHAHAHA! Glad your wah is okay, who cares about the window. :ROTF:

[Drake S.]

The guy who owns the house wasn't real thrilled about it , glad he's my cousin !

[Newc]

Lemme give you a tip about this particualr "type" of female, Chuk. I've seen these types come and go in my brother's life for over 20 years, and I have pretty much seen all the bad types. Observing my brother's failed relationships has taught me many things.

She is the type of female (referring to her as a "woman" is insulting to other women), who wants nothing more than to confuse you. She cannot stand for you to be happy, or even moderately content. She has to see to it personally that you are obsessed with and focusing strictly on her, and on getting her back, and trying to make a relationship with her work, so she can continually work against you and thus cause you grief.

She gets her jollies by making others suffer, and she's not too eager to let one of her "toys" get away before she's done.

Unfortunately, you'll be stuck with her until someone or something kills her. Even after your son is grown, she will make it a point to interfere in your happiness, and I can guarantee you she will try to use your son as one of her weapons. She will try to turn him against you.

I would suggest that you constantly remind yourself that it's over between you and her, and that you're moving on.

However, don't let on that you're really over her, or else she'll quickly move on to your son, and work as diligently to turn him against you as she has to screw up your life, and he'll be left with emotional scars that will be very hard for him to overcome.

He's not old enough to understand this type of mental disorder, but I know you understand what I'm saying. It's a game to her, and there's only three ways to win - she dies, you die, or you play along with her game and pretend to fawn over her and pursue her, then gradually ease off the fawning. Call her every week and let her say whatever, then brush it off as part of the game. If you've ever played D&D or any other RPG, think of this as an RPG. You are not who you really are, you're some guy posing as the guy she wants you to be. When you talk to her, put as much drama into it as you can muster to the point of it being sarcastic, like you're reciting lines for a play. Put on the act, then gradually fade yourself out of touch with her.

Eventually she'll tire of the game and move on to one of her other victims. It takes years, though, but if you can put on the mask and play her game and keep your true self intact, then you can win the game, and your son doesn't suffer the mental abuse she can inflict on him to get to you.

The trickiest part of this sort of thing is acting the part, and keeping the actor and the man separate, but it can be done. Ozzy always said when he's on stage, he's Ozzy, but when he's offstage, he's John.

As Bruce Lee taught: You put water into a teapot, it becomes the teapot. You put water into a bowl, it becomes the bowl. Water can flow, or it can crash. Be water, my friend.

[horns666]

Well Chuck, to be honest..Your my hero right now..

You stuck with her, sacrificed alot of yourself on a fucking ingrate..it just took 7 years to discover this. Hey man, it happends to the best of us..and sometimes it takes much longer than 7 years..I had many good friends that went thru this shit. My drummer in that VH band..he married what I thought was a "nice" girl and adopted her 1 year old boy..This dude was just kick ass in every fuggin' way..and the girls fucking LOVED him..he's a good lookin', funny, Italian kick ass drummer..and he goes home after bustin' ass and she tells him she met Mr. Wall Street at some bar..wearing a suite and shit and she bails with Mr. Wall Street, because she doesn't want a "rocker" anymore wearing jeans..this is what she actually said!!

So she lived with this fag for two weeks..I'm sure he used every hole he could and boots her fat ass to the curb..meanwhile my bud is crushed because she took his only son..he raised him for ten years since he was one..man he was hurtin..THEN ..BOOM..he lost his awesome paying job of over 20 years..WTF??!!

He called me up and said "Bill fuggit I'm going to Tampa..I'll be living with my sister till I get my shit together"..and he was gone!!

Well. it wasn't even a year later that he struck GOLD, a real beuaty that was worth almost 5 mill after her divorce settelement..he had to sell his '62 Corvette to pay for his divorce..so for his birthday..she bought him a brand spankin' new Red C5, right when they first came out..motherfucker..paid in full!!

Ten years later..they are still together..he's still wonders and misses the only son he had..but him and his awesome woman just built a new house right on the water..and he's doing GREAT, and they are happy!!

I heard his Ex wife gained 60 lbs and takes high doses of paxil and went completely fuggin' mental..gee, couldn't happen to a nicer person..

Chuck, you rule and that's it..you keep strong and have fun..things happen for a reason man..fuggit!!!

fuck her..let her make some other dumbfuck miserable..and he'll give her the boot to the ass..trust me dude..you'll be fine..fuggums!!!!

Guys like us..we kick fuggin' ass...and chicks LOVE that shit, because we're the real deal.. !!

My girl Val..ain't goin' anywhere...why is that??....she KNOWS if she walks out that door ..there will be two bitches coming in..hell yeah..motherfucker...goddamn!!!!

You just kick ass..hey if she wants you..she's gonna have to suck your balls..if not Fuck her in the ass sideways with a greasy spatula!!

Until then, go out with some friends and go trollin' for tuna and have a good time..

I know your pissed..but turn that energy into good and go fuggin' rule like I know you could!!

Your Bro,

Bill Z

[horns666]

Just re-read this..you been divorved for 7 years and now she's bitchin' and blaming..fuggin' typical..jeez...ahhhhhhhh..

read my above post..I bet Jimmy B's nut that my friend Scott's ex would go back to him in a heartbeat..her mom still calls him begging for help with her after TEN years, because she went mental ..fuck her in the ass..

She had her chance..she blew it..fuggums..

[horns666]

I gotta bail..and take care of some biz..

Be cool Chuck..fuggit..

Take care man,

Bill

[Drake S.]

Em Like I said Thanks as always , Matt You win a prize she's all that & more LoL
Billz your right it's sad but only lately in the past few months even though it's been 7 years, I have found my self worth again I deserve respect when it's been shown , this is just a really deep wound we have been together on/off since I was 16 . I'm not a security blanket or her favorite chew toy when ever she needs something to tear up anymore . I guess thats why it set me off so bad because all the efforts I made, & she drops that on me , Oh if you had just stayed to fight it out we would be together now.
Screw that I know I did my part , & I may not have been a perfect husband but when demands are something always disapoints someone.
I've worked hard to be a better person & a Dam good father, She just needs Theropy, & a deep Bacacking LoL & I allready told her recently sorry this tool isn't for rent it's only for sale:ROTF:

Thanks Guys really I hate airing my issues online but I was heading in a bad direction last night & today & this really helped.

[guitarsjb]

Hey Chuck,
Sorry to hear she pulled some shit like that bro. But I'm glad you seen it for what it is BS!! Keep your head up, find a woman who appreciates you, cause you truely are one of the great guys in this world.

[lerxstcat]

Chuck, I know it's hard to have perspective, because you probably still have mixed feelings about this woman. Sounds like she has been in your life for your whole adult life and a little more.

What she can't say but is in effect saying is that she now realizes that she fucked up. She blames you because she doesn't take responsibility for her own actions. THAT is why she can't find a good man, because they will see that. She got you when you were a kid, before you could really judge her character.

For God's sake, DON'T let her work her way back in to your life. Even for your son, that would be wrong. Better to let her crash and burn, and you take your son when she's not fit to have him. That sounds harsh but you do NOT want to become her babysitter. Because as soon as she felt secure again, she'd be back to whatever she did that split y'all up. Don't take that ride again, you can close your eyes and reminisce if you need the pain.

Be strong, and maybe get ready to take in your son fulltime when she loses it completely. Keep it as coridal as you can without giving in to her crap.

You're a good man, you deserve a good and strong woman who can be a real partner and not an albatross around your neck.

Wish I'd have thought of a wah when I had my fit. I broke a 60s Epiphone Melody Maker!

[horns666]

That's right..listen to Rich..he made a great point..

don't let her manipulate her way up your ass again..

you got your respect because you earned it..and you'll be damed to surrendered what you earned..no friggin' way..I won't let that happen..I'll call you naughty names if you do!!

you keep things as is..that's it..no guilt trips..it's all head games my man..see thru that shit..I do!!

You know what, this is "online"..but we are here for you..I'm here..man, I will tell you like it is, even if you don't want to hear it..I speak truth..it will set you free..and it's always easy to remember!!

Now, clear the head man, get out of that hazy funk and seize the day and take care of yourself!!

Bill Z

[atomic charvel guy]

Dude,
I married a woman , and I never wanted to get married in my life before, and now I can honestly say I will never marry another woman again. We are not in marrying times so to speak. You're a solid cat, and she's finding out too late, I bet it's frustrating as hell. I thought I was a good husband myself, but when I stopped making boatloads of money, I got back on dope. Real dope that is, and when I should have been stronger I used it as an excuse instead to get back on the junk again. I thought that if I bought her enough nice things that she would stay off my back, and I copped to the only true thing I was guilty of, getting back on smack. She was a drinker,(and not in the very least bit a cool one)and she told people all kinds of stuff. I'm a cheater, i'm a thief, i'm a cheater, i'm a fukkin' poser motherfukker, i'm a cheater, i'm a liar, i'm a cheater, I'm going to leave her for a younger woman, I'm a cheater, etc. etc. etc. over, and over, and over to the point where I never wanted to hear her voice again. When I thought about it dude, I did cheat on her. I cheated her out of some time, some $$$, and also out of some play time , which for us was me dodging plates and glasses like a fukkin' panther. What's cool is I offered to take the strictest lie detector test available to prove to her I was not with another woman, i went and cleaned up, nothing mattered. So let me tell you, it' s better to have your ex at least find out that you're a great guy, instead of my situation where mine probably wants me to die in a fiery car crash-lol. Here's the best part, when I got out of detox, and it was not fun let me tell you, H detox is the worst feeling in the world, compared only to a truly broken heart, i come back to my house only to find it had been emptied out by her family and put in a storage unit somewhere I have no idea about. Lots of stuff I tell ya, so there I was . Left for dead, no home, possessions gone, i'm scratching my head on what to do with my life, and so far it has come true. I've not heard her voice in over 2 years now , and each day further it goes, the more thankful I am. You know that you're a solid dude, you know the truth, and I know I'm an irresponsible, insane, fun stick of dynamite that is not fit to be anyone's husband, but I'm a nicer human being than she was to me, and deep down she knows it to, I know that, and it makes me feel really good. Thanks for asking about me the other day.

Tommy

[Endrik]

ok, I will never marry, I thought maybe I will when I'm 40 or 50 but why should I. If I settle down (when I'm old) and a women really loves me, then she wouldn't need a friggin paper to prove our "love". Why to take such risk and sign on a paper that can destroy you financially.