Tweet
- Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
- Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
- Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
- As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools.
- Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
- Sometimes I wake up grumpy, Other times I let him sleep.
- I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
- I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
- It is as bad as you think, and they are out to get you.
- I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
- Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?
- If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?
- It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
- Forget about World Peace... Visualise Using Your Turn Signal!
- Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
- Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
- We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
- Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
- He who laughs last thinks slowest
- Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
- Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
- Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.
- Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
- i souport publik edekasion
- We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile.You Will Be Assimilated.
- Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
- Three kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.
- Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
- Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'...till you can find a rock.
- Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
- Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
- Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
- As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools.
- Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
- Sometimes I wake up grumpy, Other times I let him sleep.
- I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
- I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
- It is as bad as you think, and they are out to get you.
- I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
- Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?
- If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?
- It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
- Forget about World Peace... Visualise Using Your Turn Signal!
- Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
- Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
- We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
- Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
- He who laughs last thinks slowest
- Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
- Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
- Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.
- Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
- i souport publik edekasion
- We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile.You Will Be Assimilated.
- Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
- Three kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.
- Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
- Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'...till you can find a rock.
- Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
Comment