So its real.. I'm getting a divorce

[Spivonious]

After reading the thread from December, I'd have to say you're doing the right thing GG. Marriage should not be about fixing someone. You should feel completely comfortable with your wife; leave nothing hidden. From what I've read, you just can't do that with your wife or she'll go psycho on you.

Tell her that counseling won't help because you don't want to stay with her.

I think that your feeligns of love towards her are actually feelings of fear of the unknown. You've (presumably) been with her for a few years at least and it's scary going back out into the lonely world of single life. But staying with someone simply to not be alone is a horrible reason for staying married. You're only 22; live your life.

[toejam]

With every divorce, the gay marriage supporters get a little more ammunition. So, thanks for becoming another statistic.

I find so little relevance or need, for that remark.
One has nothing to do with the other.

Yeah, really. What was the point in making that comment?

[Horse Called War]

What is more important your sanity, health and well being or a note on a car. I would give her the car, cut my losses and move on to being happy in your life. Life passes you buy 2 fast to be miserable.

[Norton]

What is more important your sanity, health and well being or a note on a car. I would give her the car, cut my losses and move on to being happy in your life. Life passes you buy 2 fast to be miserable.

Uh huh. Bad boy.


She cheated on him?Why would she deserve to get the car?

[MikeStrat]

Move on man! I know it's easy to type but life is too damn short to be with someone who makes you miserable. Especially at 22 and no ties. Do what these guys say and after the dust settles you will be much happier.

[wilkinsi]

GWARGHOUL - it's sad when a marriage doesn't work out but there is a time to cut the ties and call it quits. If she's been cheating and abusive, then it's time to get out. Do NOT let what she's done cause you to question yourself. She sounds like she's selfish and has her own problems, neither of which is YOUR problem.

Thank YOU. You just nailed my previous dilema on the head. I feel even better now.

[fett]

First things first. Get divorced. Make it clean and be done with it. That will be a let down because you think you may have fucked up. But you haven't. If it's as bad as you say, you are doing the right thing. As for the other lady. Get your head on straight before you seek her out. If she thinks for a minute that she is your back-up, that will not be a good thing. In otherwords, leave a gap between the old and the new and approach her like you have just discovered her again. And don't say a word about the EX. I'm drunk, but I think I'm right.

[NextInLine]

I think I might be codependant, because I'm fearing not being able to attract anyone, and getting insecure feelings about my relationship with this girl in California I've known, and we've been magnatized to each other for 5 years now..

You're 22 and you're fearing not being able to attract anyone? That's just not right! You'll get into good shape once you get rid of your problems, you can grow your hair again in a short time. You're a guitar player, you have a job! That's a lot man!..

And feeling insecure about that new relationship at this moment can be kinda normal. You'll get over it and learn how to cover your ass imo!

... and I'm fighting depression and anxiety again, so its all making it more confusing, and hazy. I work too fucking much too.

Working much can be considered good also, you have something to keep your mind busy, I think you should get rid of your problems and start putting your life on its way again, everything will get better. I can even see you posting here how happy you are with a new chick and maybe some new gear!

[pinto79]

I don't have any wise words of wisdom, but it sounds like you need to get out and get YOUR life back on track.

Good luck with it bro. We've got your back.

[levantin]

I was in a similar situation a few years back. I wasn't married to her, thank god, but was in a similar depression. To me a relationship is the sharing of what two people can bring to the table. If all she's bringing in is misery, then you are better off without her. Of course she's going to do what she can to avoid this (misery loves company) but it sounds like she has damaged the trust and the relationship beyond breaking point. Personally I wouldn't look a cheater in the face again.

You have nothing to loose my friend, and so much to gain. From what I understand you have the means to support yourself financially. You're 22 for Christ's sakes. Do you really want to spend the best years of your life miserably? Get out there, start over! I guarantee that you will not regret it.

Best of luck.

[necrotechno]

Yeah, really. What was the point in making that comment?

The instution of marriage in this country has gone to shit. Too easy to get married, too easy to get divorced. It just doesn't mean anything anymore. We need to get the "til death do us part" quotation put in the actual legal agreement. That way, you'd have a couple of more permanent avenues out.

[Endrik]

It just doesn't mean anything anymore.

yeah and it shouldn't... just a bunch of papers and shit... you need papers to prove you love someone.... what a joke

[Endrik]

We need to get the "til death do us part" quotation put in the actual legal agreement.

did you married to a fembot?.... just asking

[buzzsaww]

marriage is contrived and a farce and has always been. not only that, who are you to judge anyone's situation?

The instution of marriage in this country has gone to shit. Too easy to get married, too easy to get divorced. It just doesn't mean anything anymore. We need to get the "til death do us part" quotation put in the actual legal agreement. That way, you'd have a couple of more permanent avenues out.

[Bengal]

What we need to do is either get the church or the state out of marriage. I find it funny that we run to the church, in most cases, to get married but then run to the state to get divorced. One should do both...