For all of you lucky and ungrateful....

[atomic charvel guy]

my dad fathered and spoiled 8 kids, and lived to be 86. he was my first call everyday mon.-fri. in the office and went over all the scores with him. not enough room to write how much my parents have put up with and put out for when it came to their kids. It's ridiculous. My mom is 83 now, still plays tennis with the 40 year olds, she's amazing.

[straycat]

Moms are special.

[guitarsjb]

I lost my dad when I was 14, never really knew him (he and my mom split up when I was 1)...lost my mom when I was 25. My husband James still has both of his parents and he's 62!! His dad was just diagnosed with prostate cancer (at 83!) and his mom is doing fine. He wonders why I tell him all the time, hey call your mom, you should call your dad today..he doesn't know how it is to lose one. I'm jealous for sure...

[Joe_Steeler]

Parenting is a privilege and not a right. A good parent is more than just putting food on the table.
At the same time being a good son is just not getting into trouble or using a four letter word at the table.

What the fuck is wrong with me today?? I don't know.....
I miss my father, I miss talking to him, I miss having him there seating next to me eating a hot dog and watching a game. I miss his advise and I regret as all fuck not telling him I loved him more often.
I regret him not meeting his grand daughters.

My relationship with my mom is OK, I wanted to do more for her and get closer but she will not let me. Her way or the highway or just drive you fucking insane with mental games. I bowed out...

My dad never ever did anything to hurt me.

Maybe "YOUR" dad was not the best, but do not loose the opportunity to be the best son for him. You'll be a better man in the long run and he will acknowledge.

You know?, it is funny how people change. For quite some time, I loved someone so much I wanted to be cremated and put in the jar as that person. To spent the rest of eternity together. I do not longer feel that, not even close.
But everyday my father is not here I miss him more and more. Not a changing or shifting feeling. My feelings towards others have changed drastically, almost unbeliabably. But my father is burned in my memory, even the last night where he was alive and I was spoon feeding him soup in a hospital bed.

It was the perfect "cycle of life" coming to a close. I was there all alone with him.... Father and son.
Love you Papi.

[Cygnus X1]

Joe, I would like to say don't beat yourself up. To be honest, my Dad and I never had that idyllic life that the TV likes to depict. I could easily say he was a hardass, never gave me a break, never gave a chance to talk to him man-to-man. But through a series of events in my own life, I learned how to sincerely take control, to say"I love You, Dad," and back it up, and not wait for his approval. After years of this, I am blessed, and some may say cursed, that he now calls me for advice. Now I get to feel the weighty burden he has bourne on his shoulders in my adulthood. So, I feel that it is a genetic response that we must seperate from our fathers, it is a necessary tragedy of life, but it is necessary for us to carry our burden properly, as bearers of the torch. Bless you man, you nailed it.

[missionguitars1]

He wonders why I tell him all the time, hey call your mom, you should call your dad today..he doesn't know how it is to lose one. I'm jealous for sure...

My wife is the reason why I call my parents a couple times a week - they're in their 80's now, and who knows how long they have? We really never got along until my wife pushed us together (and, to be honest she can't STAND them :ROTF, but she knows better than I what family means...

[atomic charvel guy]

i had the T.V. version Dad, and if I did something horribly wrong, he was right there to say "it was'nt him"-lol, no, he really was right there to say you moron, you know right from wrong, I am convinced of that, why did you do this? I always answered back, for fun and attention from girls pop, and he would either smirk or just shake his head. But he sent all of us to great schools, and i never saw him and my mother trily fight. They had arguments or differences of opinion, but never fighting. Goes to show a near textbook upbringing does not guarantee a model citizen-lol I'm a trainwreck that keeps rolling, you'd think otherwise.

[jacksoncsplayer]

Wow, what a Post ! My Dad split when I was seven, and he did'nt want a whole lot to do with us. As I got older I found out he was Shagging everything that walked and left Mom for another Woman. I did'nt quite understand why when I was younger but we were able to make amends when I was about twenty two, and the last twenty years we have gotten pretty close. It's hard to say if I would have been a different man had he stuck around but I cherish the time I have with him now (mostly phone calls). My stepfathers were nuts, one tried to kill me because ha had a korean war flashback and thought I was the enemy. He proceeded to chase me around the neighborhood with a gun. Fortunately I was fast and he was drunk. Nothing like the real Pops, mistakes and all.

[Joe_Steeler]

A lot of pain guys. I guess my point was to try to be the BEST dad you can be to your kids and be the best son you can be. Sometimes we are too close to the trees to see the forest behind.
When pops is gone, he is gone for good and only faith will help you survive this life hoping to see him again.

One of my best friends had the same deal, he was born and his father walked away. FOREVER.
No calls, no letters, no child support, no graduation call, no call before his wedding last year. I can tell by talking to him the void he has in heart because of that. He is one of the best men I have ever met. Responsible, a hard worker, now a good husband and luckily soon to be a father of a boy of his own.
I have no doubt he will be the best father he can be because he learned in the flesh what an asshole can do to you. At the same time, a good father means everything in the world to a son or daughter. I always felt bad for him, but now I have nothing but joy for him.

Sundays will forever be hard for me......

[mm2002]

Sorry to hear about this man. My dad had his 6th heart attack a few days ago and honestly I don't know how he's hanging on, but he is. I didn't even meet him until I was 26, so to me he's really more of a friend than a dad....but he's my kids grandpa, and a damn good one. I don't know what I'll do or how I'll feel when he's gone, but it's going to be a tough one. I wish you the best bro.

[Joe_Steeler]

Hey cheer up fellas, I am not the first and will not be the last. It's Monday and I got 5 more days of playing.

You know what the fugger said when I said I wanted to play guitar??
He said "well you better get a job cause I ain't buying shit for you". I said "fine dickhead!".
I started painting houses after school, on the weekends and full time in the summer. Pretty much myself and a buddy. Saved my pennies and bought a '82 Strat, still have it and as far as I can see will never sell it.
Then I said "Hey pops I got the guitar on my own, now I need an amp!" he said "an amp? WTF for?, well.... keep painting houses".
I did and I bought a Peavey Bandit.

Pretty soon I was ripped fom rolling paint, nice tan from being outside and playing guitar in a rock 'n roll band in high school. The result --> I got more poontang than a GI on a Vietnamese whorehouse.
The 'ol man knew what he was doing, my mom had no clue.

[RacerX]

Damn, Alvin, your post made me tear up a bit. My dad is 72 and still very active, we used to hate each other but now he has mellowed out and we see each other 2 or 3 times a month., In fact, this Wednesday he is taking me to Knott's Berry Farm Halloween Haunt! http://www.knotts.com/ (His idea) He is taking the train from LA and we'll hang out with the monsters til the wee hours and I'll drive him home. I will definitely give him a hug! Hell, we'll probably be jumping 3 feet in the air & screaming like teenaged girls! :ROTF:

[horns666]

My father and my family is the opposite of what you'd see on TV as a "normal" family..except for a popular HBO show and a few movies. My dad is the only person on earth I take advice from. I feel honored that he runs things by me these days..for my advice.

I talk to him everyday. I wouldn't be the person, father, husband, or friend ect without him. We are alot alike in too many ways. But raised me not to take the same path he did, actually quite the opposite..
He put me in charge of everything when he goes and we talk about it all the time. Never a pleasant conversation..but has piece of mind knowing I'll keep his wishes and take care of family biz.

I'm not looking forward to that..he is the only real "heroe" I'll ever know.

[destructin_od]

My father passed away 10 years ago this past January. I talk to him everyday. He was only 50 years old. I will see you again.

Omg... sorry for your lost man

[shreddermon]

My folks are getting up there in years, mid-70s for both. I'm not sure how much longer I'll have them. And, since they started becoming Florida "snowbirds" a few years ago, I've become more sensitive to this. I miss them because they actually are gone, location-wise. Just left again a few days ago, actually.

And, a few years ago, an aunt and uncle - who were close neighbors to and best friends with my folks down in Florida - died in a horrific, fiery car crash. That hurt my parents bad. The whole extended family, actually. I still tear up everytime I think about them, and how suddenly - and tragically - they died.

I didn't have the greatest or most stable environment growing up. But my parents were products of their own upbringings and environment - Italian goombas, with all that comes along with it, good and bad. Things can get whacked with my dad at times, but he's always tried to do the best he can for us kids - mistakes and all. And, for that, I love him. It's all we can ask for out of any parent, actually. My mom has been the family bedrock, through thick and thin. As far as I'm concerned, she should be considered for sainthoood for all that she's done and put up with. Through good and bad, they always tried to put their kids first.

I guess I take all of that into account when raising my own kids. In some respects, I absolutely refuse to repeat the mistakes of the past - the scars from my own upbringing. But, despite all that, my folks taught me a lot of lessons on how to raise your kids well, and what's most important for them. I really admire my parents for all that they accomplished for their family. It's really quite amazing considering what little they had or were when they moved to America. And I love them for it, and who they are.