"Casa del Fuggem" Part 2 of The Legacy

[SEEGERMANY]

"Val called to Bill
Come and watch Rocky
Bill told her no
I'm surfing for bukakke"

[atomic charvel guy]

I'm perched on the roof of the garage with heavy artillery Jack.
I'm doing really well dude, thanks. You'd be impressed I think.
I'm so sorry about your mom.

i have a Kinks tune that I hum each time we reach this time of year.
It goes-

Father Christmas, give us some money
Don't mess around with those silly toys.
We'll beat you up if you don't hand it over
We want your bread so don't make us annoyed
Give all the toys to the little rich boys

[Jack The Riffer]

I thought kookbats hung upside down

[Dreamland_Rebel]

Merry Fuggums, Bill.

[VitaminG]

I get a little whimsical this time of year, and start to sing to myself the lyrics of Kevin Bloody Wilson's classic xmas song.... (check it out on YouTube for a rendition by the man himself)


Hey Santa claus you cunt!
Where's me fucking bike?
I've unwrapped all this other junk and there's nothing that I like.
I wrote you a fucking letter and I come to see you twice
Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me fucking bike.

If I wanted a pair of bloody thongs, I'd have bloody asked.
And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your arse!
You've stuffed me bloody order up
It's enough to make you spew
And I'm not the only one who's snakey
Me sisters dirty too!

(female voice)
Hey santa clause you cunt!
Where's me fucking pram?
You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am.
'Cause I'm the little girl who you made sit right on your hand
I'll give you fucking ho ho ho
You forgot me fucking pram

(male voice)
Next time I come to see ya, I'm gonna punch you in the guts
And I'll let your fucking reindeer go and kick Rudolf in the nuts!
You just wait 'till next year, when you go to that store
And me and me little sister, come stomping through the door

And we'll say, yeah you wait for it
Hey mums and dads you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes
And don't listen to him boys and girls 'cause he tells fucking lies
He's just a piss tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright
'Cause the old fucking wanker Forgot me fucking bike.

You wait you old cunt, I'm gonna dob you in
Tell me old man on you, he's gonna punch your fucking lights out

[Jack The Riffer]

Dear Dr. Bill,

When I play paintball I can get shot with any color without a problem but when I get shot with green paintballs I get horny. Why is it that the green ones make me horny???

Sincerely,
Splattered

[Jack The Riffer]

Dear Dr. Bill,

Do Autopsies tickle?

[atomic charvel guy]

Dear Dr. Bill,
why do drive up ATM's have braille pads?-lol

[horns666]

John..I love you!

Ewww..I was standing right next to an autopsy of a naked lady I discovered dumped in the woods. Man, it was freakin' me out but I had to play it "cool" because my friends in homicide were getting all the info from me. Those two silly fuckers were crazy. Well, they have to be if I say they were. Well, they're used to that shit. One was eating a Hostess cherry pie while the bone saw was zippin' across her noggin'...you could smell the skullsmoke.

OK, enough of that one.

I'll answer another one.

[Jack The Riffer]

John..I love you!

Awww, that makes my naughty bits tingle.

Right back atcha bro!!

[horns666]

Dear Dr. Bill,
why do drive up ATM's have braille pads?-lol

Damn..that is a good question!!! Why do ATMs have brail pads and currency doesn't. Blind people must get ripped off like a muthafucker. You would think so..yes? Ironically, I knew two blind dudes that ran little candy/snack stands. They sold alot of stuff too. Weird how they new were the Kools and Marlboros were, and can tell the difference between the Snickers and a Milky Way bars. They didn't like when you tried to help them either. Like if you try to guide their reach to the right stuff. They would bark.."I'll find it!!!"...and they would.

[VitaminG]

Skull Smoke! Good band name!

[VitaminG]

Damn..that is a good question!!! Why do ATMs have brail pads and currency doesn't. Blind people must get ripped off like a muthafucker. You would think so..yes?

over here, each denomination is a different size, so blind folk can grab a currency gauge to measure the note they're about to hand over. Don't know what they'd do in the US, although I did find reference to a braille marker that you can use to imprint your notes at home so you know what you're pulling out of the wallet at the shops. But I'd imagine you'd still need help identifying them.

Just found this wallet on the Vision Australia site: http://www.visionaustralia.org/catal...t=Default.aspx
each sleeve is sized for specific note values. So you can't accidentally stuff a hunnert into the 5 dollar section. Great idea!

[Hellbat]

Modern Canadian currency has a modified braille type system on the bills.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canadian_currency_tactile_feature

[horns666]

Awww, that makes my naughty bits tingle.

Right back atcha bro!!

My naughty bits have been very sad lately. I don't think I shaved my sack in a month. That's really rare for me. I'm afraid to even look down there. I hope the brush hasn't overgrown and engulfed the dark marsupial. OK, that is sad. Actually, typing that right now has inspired me to shave the sack. I will wait 'till my son goes to basketball practice. I don't like being interupted with tom foolery with a cheap generic disposable to my pud's throat.


Speaking of shaving. I'm teaching my kid how to shave and he's being such a puss about it. He didn't belive I could shave my entire head and face with no water or shaving cream. So, I did it..total dry shave man.

Fuggit, I'm gonna dry shave the frank and beans...like a man..a crazyman!!!

I just turned down sex with the wife. The kid is off the BB practice. Our Bella had just had surgery (spayed) and doesn't have that lampshade thing on her head. So, the wife is keeping an eye on her so she don't fuck with her stitches. I had to remind the wife of this..see, no sex for me. I'm very sad..but I'm still gonna dry shave the sack. I haven't even been in the mood to pull pork. I'm in a funk!