Wilksy-baby is OUR Champion!

[Rsmacker]

Get the bunting out, I'm going to enter Wilksy-baby (oo-er!) in this little contest, he'd win erm, hands down. He is deffo our Champion Wanker!!!!

Link is possibly NSFW, especially if your boss is a miserable cunt.

http://gizmodo.com/394336/japan-dominates-masturbate+a+thon-gadgets-help-break-8-hour-30-minute-record-nsfw

[sonicsamurai]

hahahah OMG yes!!!


WILKSY!! WILKSY!! he's our man if he can't wank it noone can!!

[Gartron]

Oh, oh...that looka like a tantrum coming over that there hill....Take cover!

[shobet]

And I bet he'll be wearing his Tenga...

[wilkinsi]

Rsrimmer, I look nothing like that bloke. The JCF does have a champion TWUNT tho - that's YOU.

[Rsmacker]

Come on now Wilksy-baby, you can do better than that! Where's all the venom, all the aggression, where's your good old British spunk?

Oh, and you do look like that bloke you know. When you are at the vinegar strokes about to blow your beans, your eyes go all Oriental-style, trust me.

Actually, they go more like that bloke off Kung-Fu :
"Ahhh, glasshopper, so you have discovered way of butterfry stlokes on elect penis. Velly good"

Anyway, don't panic, I've e-mailed Seb Coe to see if you can form the nucleus of the first British log-flogging team. If we can get an endorsement deal with Tenga, you'll be sorted. You'll become a national hero, leave it to me, I'll make sure everyone in Europe knows you are our premier Wanker.

Keep practising, see you soon sweetie. Are we still on for Friday night? Is Jodie-the-Pig coming? Are we still going to do, y'know, "that thing"? Can't wait!!

[wilkinsi]

Oh I'm sure she's a pig, though a size 8 is hardly enough for riding the waves. I used to stuff an apple in her gob as I porked her doggy style, holding her arms behind her back .

Oh yes, we're still on for friday - I've got a headset with an extra long cable, just enough to hang you from the office ceiling. I can't wait to kick that chair from underneath you. Pfft! Jodie can cart you your sick corpse out to the council wheelybin. But just in case, she can use my trusty hacksaw to chop you in half. You're a whale in comparison to Jodie "the pig". Or instead of going offline to concentrate on gay shit you'll post here, why not just get a job? I mean a real job you twunt. Stop being a manwhore . Sonic never said what happened at his "house warming" party. Perhaps his arse is still hurting from all that rimming you gave him. After all, you do talk a lot of shit.

[VitaminG]

Come on now Wilksy-baby, you can do better than that! Where's all the venom, all the aggression, where's your good old British spunk?

shouldn't he be preserving his good old British spunk for the wanking comp?

y'know, it's my theory that the only reason you two bickering poms are still on this board is because the admins can't understand a word you're both saying to each other.

[toejam]

y'know, it's my theory that the only reason you two bickering poms are still on this board is because the admins can't understand a word you're both saying to each other.

Yes, and the fact we'd rather not get involved in a lovers' quarrel.

[Rsmacker]

Yes, and the fact we'd rather not get involved in a lovers' quarrel.

<Sniff> Thanks man, we're working through it, with copious jars of KY, but I think we'll make it. He's just.....so.....so.......ANIMALISTIC, soooo angry, but you know what? I love him, he's so sexy when he's in his suit, all zipped up,
This is the only place we get to communicate, I ring him at work and he ignores the calls (despite being put on the Naughty Table next to Headmaster Gruffnut), then when I see him after detention it's just raw passion. All I get then is: "Gnnnnnffff...mmmmmm...oooooowwwww....gmmpsshh h" through the ball-gag. His bulging eyes tell me we have something special though.

I just hope that he makes time during his training for next year's Wank-a-thon to keep talking to me here.

[Rsmacker]

Phew, thanks for last night Wilksy-baby, my root is red raw. How is the balloon knot? (Shredded, last time I saw it, turning itself inside out and gaping).

Up for some more man-on-man bum fun tonight sweetie?

[wilkinsi]

Lying poof. You never turned up. You don't even have my address. Or let me guess? Cyber sex? Twunt. And Jodie was dumped months ago. Just goes to show how much shit you talk.

[nhspike]

Never-ending source of tears from laughter when you two get going.
Oh my.
LOLOLOLOLOLOL

[Rsmacker]

S-s-so who was I porking last night, all suited up????? Shit, have you seen your Dad today? Is he limping?

Wilksy-baby, I wouldn't cyber with you, or let you down deliberately. I can tell from your last post how disappointed you are, never mind, I'll make it up to you tonight, I want to be sniffing my wrist all week and thinking of you, my own little Call-centre slave bitch.

BTW, when did you get that RR?

[toejam]

<Sniff> Thanks man, we're working through it, with copious jars of KY, but I think we'll make it. He's just.....so.....so.......ANIMALISTIC, soooo angry, but you know what? I love him, he's so sexy when he's in his suit, all zipped up,
This is the only place we get to communicate, I ring him at work and he ignores the calls (despite being put on the Naughty Table next to Headmaster Gruffnut), then when I see him after detention it's just raw passion. All I get then is: "Gnnnnnffff...mmmmmm...oooooowwwww....gmmpsshh h" through the ball-gag. His bulging eyes tell me we have something special though.

I just hope that he makes time during his training for next year's Wank-a-thon to keep talking to me here.

LOL You had me a ball gag. :ROTF: