I could friggin kill my buds for this joke!

[horns666]

Savage, I may share some pretty vivid assignment I've had..I could write books of it.


I'll do that @ Casa Del Fuggums.. where I like to ramble.

[necrotechno]

I went to Petsmart once to get some dog food and gave the girl a twenty and then realized I had the change to go with it (it was like $15.26 or something).

Me: "Oh, I have the 26 cents."
Cashier: "It's too late."
Me: "..."

My mom told me she wanted one of those leatherman multi-tool thingies, but she'd seen one with scissors in it, and that's what she wanted. So I went to Wal-Mart and got one for her, $48.57. I give the guy a fifty, he gives me a dollar forty-three.

Give the Swiss-Army-knife-with-scissors to my mom, oh no, she meant a little one that goes on your keychain. So I take the thing back to Wal-Mart.

At the returns counter, I present the Leatherman tool and receipt, along with the very same buck forty-three the guy in sporting goods had given me the night before. Expecting a fifty back, or at least two twenties and a ten, right? The returns girl's response? "Oh, I can't do that. My money will come up wrong."

[GryphonGuitar]

My father in law once spent ten minutes carefully educating a teenager in the grocery store about how much 400 and 500 come out to when put together... She couldn't handle it "cuz of all the zeroes..."

It's a lost cause.

[Endrik]

and I thought I suck at math

[Rsmacker]

My theory is that its not shit but chocolate mousse given as an enema and then the scene cuts and the girl has it all in her crack but its not the same "shit". Then all the vomitting comes from a tube hidden on the girls body and such. It could easily be faked using such methods. Thats my theory as to why these girls dont just vomit all over the place from it. Its faked.

Your theory is wrong.

In those poo-movies, like "Chocolate Lovers" etc, the dumper squats and unleashes a whole world of slurry over the recipient. This is due to a good cleansing enema, no need to mess around with choc mousse. Just connect the bag, hold it in for a while, bingo, one log-free arsehole. Perfect for when you are being bummed by Mistress' strap-on and don't want her to pull out of your donut and get a blow-back of sweetcorn and tomato skins. She will not be amused!

However, should you happen across some good old Gespreibecht German ca-ca films, behold the difference. Delight in the emerging turtle's head, nuzzling its way into the sunlight before snapping off into some bird's gob. Giggle as the man turns round and smears it across her face with his sandal then pisses on it to get it off the sole. You can see every glistening furrow, every husk and pulse, almost feel the strain of nipping the beast off whilst trying to ignore the film crew focussing on your balloon knot. These are genuine 2' growlers, delivered as Mother Nature intended, like a Lion-bar standing out of someone's gob.

Feel your stomach wobble as the recipient chews, getting it in there, in between her teeth, that's gonna take some washing out. Astound at her smile, she actually looks attractive, you might even have kissed her once at a teenage party.

Then feel growing unease as the action moves to the Vomitorium for some "Roman Showers". Pity the poor wretch who is watching some chick nip one off in a casserole dish then piss on it and swill it about, dissolving the meal. A quick barf on top and you have a ready-meal, lovingly poured down the slave's throat. Hmmmm, yummy!

Then, like me, feel your stomach heave as the two dirty bitches hock great green lungies from deep inside their chests into his mouth as dessert. That was the thing that made me turn off. Disgusting!

Check out Veronica Moser delicately eating a gritty stool on a china plate with her knife and fork, the picture of deportment.

Some of these people don't have taste buds/sense of smell, some are just sick puppies.

Yes, they do it, it does something for them, no, I don't understand it. Mind you, some people don't understand the appeal of having their arse whipped purple! Different strokes for different folks (so to speak).

I mean, ever tried drinking your Mrs' piss? No? Why not, it's sterile! Not my erm, er, cup of tea, but there you go.
Snowballing? Eeeeew, fuck that, not for me.
A2M?
Extreme CBT?

The list goes on, don't dismiss something you find unbelievable, you might just be a prude living a sheltered life.

And don't knock it till you've tried it (right Wilksy-baby?)

[GryphonGuitar]

*lol* You rock.

[savage]

The list goes on, don't dismiss something you find unbelievable, you might just be a prude living a sheltered life.

Well maybe but i would rather be THAT than a shit and vomit eater

[Spivonious]

My mom told me she wanted one of those leatherman multi-tool thingies, but she'd seen one with scissors in it, and that's what she wanted. So I went to Wal-Mart and got one for her, $48.57. I give the guy a fifty, he gives me a dollar forty-three.

Give the Swiss-Army-knife-with-scissors to my mom, oh no, she meant a little one that goes on your keychain. So I take the thing back to Wal-Mart.

At the returns counter, I present the Leatherman tool and receipt, along with the very same buck forty-three the guy in sporting goods had given me the night before. Expecting a fifty back, or at least two twenties and a ten, right? The returns girl's response? "Oh, I can't do that. My money will come up wrong."

Yeah, I honestly think that the cashiers think that the register keeps track of how many pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters, ones, fives, tens, twenties, and fifties there are in the drawer.

[Endrik]

I agree with the fine English gentleman here

[Carbuff]

Wait a sec. So youre saying that because Im not into shit eating that Im a prude living a sheltered life?:ROTF: And no one else here thinks that *this*video might be faked? I know that theres some real shit video out there, Im just saying that this one is a bit suspect.

[stevoc]

Wait a sec. So youre saying that because Im not into shit eating that Im a prude living a sheltered life?

I'll take the sheltered life.

[Rsmacker]

Good point, and seeing as I haven't actually seen this one, it could be a er, shitty fake.

My point is that it is way easier to make the movie for real than to fake it. But call me old-fashioned, but I like my poo to look like poo, nice and gnarled, just like Bungle's finger. To me it is cheating to loosen it all up with an enema, I wanna see beads of sweat on furrowed brows as they pinch the loaf. Kinda like amateur porn, it could be YOU grabbing the strain bar and heaving to unleash the Kraken. Sloppy cack just reminds me of Sunday mornings after a curry and lager frenzy, crapping through the eye of a needle and swearing never to do it again. Where's the eroticism in that?*

Anyway there are people about who will do it and love it. I think I speak to one at the newsagents in the morning, he certainly has breath that suggests he necks turds.

Hmmmm, where's Wilksy-baby lately? I'm buying a video camera, we're going into FILMS!!!!



* Not that I have any interest in chod anyway, apart from the comedic value of a Dirty Sanchez, or giving someone a "flying pasty". Hilarious. The movies will be for our personal viewing pleasure, right W-B? (and limited leaks to various media outlets)

[toejam]

Two girls, one finger (the one with the Japanese girls) looks like real poo to me. Some people just have a fecophelia fetish. Definitely not something I'd want to do, but I'm depraved enough to watch it. :ROTF:

[horns666]

I can always count on you guys to crack my ass up!!!

[toejam]

I mean, ever tried drinking your Mrs' piss? No? Why not, it's sterile!

Wrong. Your own urine is sterile to your own body, not anybody else's.