Any of you English blokes.....

[Rsmacker]

You also just used one of OUR words - bawbag. Credit where it's due eh?

Two, you forgot "bass'as". As in "C'mere y'ffff y'fff' ffuckin bass'as. Ah'll kill yers aw".

Taken from the Rsmacker Book of World Languages contributed by our friendly neighbourhood Scotch piss artist tramp. Every town has one, sometimes more, sometimes lots, all standing round a burning oildrum on waste ground, drinking Purple Nasties. Cliched, but fucking spot on!

[MartinBarre]

Two, you forgot "bass'as". As in "C'mere y'ffff y'fff' ffuckin bass'as. Ah'll kill yers aw".

Taken from the Rsmacker Book of World Languages contributed by our friendly neighbourhood Scotch piss artist tramp. Every town has one, sometimes more, sometimes lots, all standing round a burning oildrum on waste ground, drinking Purple Nasties. Cliched, but fucking spot on!

What's a Purple Nasty? And "bass'as"? Naw, no one says that - "Ya bastarts" would be more like it. And unfortunately you're right about the rest. Dumbarton seems to be about 40% people like that, I fucking hate when I have to go into town there.

[Rsmacker]

the welsh valleys IS Welsh, those northern tossers are just snobish farmers who are gutted the Captial is in the south (where i might add everyone speaks english).
The strongest welsh heritage and history and 'sterotyping' comes from the welsh mining valleys in the south, where I proudly live!!

Precisely why those savages I am unfortunately related to despise the South so much. Apparently, being unable to speak the language of the country you hail from, apart from saying "Yakky-da" and singing like a cunt, whilst proudly proclaiming to be a separate entity to England is like Georgia claiming to be different from Russia.

I proudly taught my father to speak proper English, like wot I does, and happily remember many childhood times, remorselessly taking the piss out of him as he fumed and blustered, trying to find the English words to bollock us with.
He gets his own back at family do's though. Me, my brother & sister and my Ma sit in a corner of the room whilst they all jabber away, looking over at us and occasionally laughing. Cunts.

And they are not rich farmers, they are, erm......now there's a thing. What the fuck do they do? Actually, quite possibly living on dole money supplied by us kind Englishmen, whilst plotting to murder us all in our beds.

Anyway, I'd move to Wales proper, tomorrow, if I could speak the language. I couldn't face the natives looking at me in the same way I look at Mr Patel from Bradford who can't speak English (ie. a sickly smile to my face, then call me a cunt).


The most famous Welsh person, Siadwell :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LSjtBkdMM1U
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqMTtd4dl8U&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Drrwhatg4T4&feature=related

Or, Denzil and Gwynnedd, everyday Welsh folk:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDKbVQwBf50&feature=related

And who can forget Ali G in the land of Wales?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usOg34kG-IA&feature=related

[Rsmacker]

What's a Purple Nasty? And "bass'as"? Naw, no one says that - "Ya bastarts" would be more like it. And unfortunately you're right about the rest. Dumbarton seems to be about 40% people like that, I fucking hate when I have to go into town there.

What's a Purple Nasty? Hang your head in shame young man, what kind of Sweaty are you? Why, it's the world famous Tramp Juice - Tennants Super (although, I used to drink Snakebite, Pernod and Blackcurrant, and that was called Purple Nasty too. Stopped drinking it after a horrific midnight bedroom re-decoration incident after 9 pints of it. The stains are there to this very day.)

[SEEGERMANY]

I once dated a gal from across the pond and she commented that she had trouble understanding our conversations because of the excessive use of "slang." Bitch needs to read this thread!

[dangerous_dave]

[Guyver1]

Anyway, I'd move to Wales proper, tomorrow, if I could speak the language. I couldn't face the natives looking at me in the same way I look at Mr Patel from Bradford who can't speak English (ie. a sickly smile to my face, then call me a cunt).

move to the valleys, we're more friendly than the northern lot and we wont hate you and talk about you in welsh either behind your back, or directly in front of you just to patronise you for not learning the language.

theres nothing more pig ignorant and arrogant than some welsh c**nts speaking welsh knowing damn well the people they're with cant speak it.

[Norton]

I'm very white! I'm Irish, English, Danish, Welsh and Scottish from my mom's side of the family. I'm Italian from my dad's side. I hate my mom for giving me the really pale gene and having no chance in the sun!

Joe, you're Roman.But not regular Roman. Ed Roman.

[MartinBarre]

What's a Purple Nasty? Hang your head in shame young man, what kind of Sweaty are you? Why, it's the world famous Tramp Juice - Tennants Super (although, I used to drink Snakebite, Pernod and Blackcurrant, and that was called Purple Nasty too. Stopped drinking it after a horrific midnight bedroom re-decoration incident after 9 pints of it. The stains are there to this very day.)

Ah. I had one can of Tennent's Super when I was about 14, went on a roundabout at high speed and ended up totally off my face.
Disgusting stuff, IIRC it tasted very sweet.
I'd rather have your purple headed nasty up my arse than drink another can of that shit.

[shobet]

move to the valleys, we're more friendly than the northern lot and we wont hate you and talk about you in welsh either behind your back, or directly in front of you just to patronise you for not learning the language.

Move to the post-industrial ghost towns that most of the real valley towns have become. He could hang around with the local Brynmawr massive, drinking White Lightning, wearing knock off Kappa shell suits, and experience the joy of loitering outside the local Spar store and sniffing glue. Mind you knowing that sick fucker, he might just like that.

So it's us Welsh speaking cunts that are responsible for your inability to grasp the native language, interesting theory.

theres nothing more pig ignorant and arrogant than some welsh c**nts speaking welsh knowing damn well the people they're with cant speak it.

Fucking hell, calling Welsh speakers ignorant is slightly ironic, especially when you are treating the English language worse than some foreigners. See your grammar above.

[toejam]

Joe, you're Roman.But not regular Roman. Ed Roman.

I am no troll! Oh, wait, maybe I am. :ROTF:

[Rsmacker]

I'd rather have your purple headed nasty up my arse than drink another can of that shit.

If I were you, I'd have a few cans of that shit first, it might dull the pain. Anyway, you're on, you've twisted my arm, you smooth-talking bastard. We gotta keep it quiet though, in case a certain Call-Centre Bitch from Nottingham finds out about it. It's amazing how much he can whinge, even when fully ball-gagged.

[Rsmacker]

Move to the post-industrial ghost towns that most of the real valley towns have become. He could hang around with the local Brynmawr massive, drinking White Lightning, wearing knock off Kappa shell suits, and experience the joy of loitering outside the local Spar store and sniffing glue. Mind you knowing that sick fucker, he might just like that.

Ding dong, I feel a certain amount of blood heading groin-wards. Yeah, I can see it now, I could be like a Jimmy Saville-type figure in my gold lame shell-suit, I'd be King of the Hill, erm Valley. I might even get first dibs on some bit of fluff, be the first to impregnate her! My royal line would live on! Fucking A, I'm moving.

Oh, hang on. Guyver, are you sure there are none of the ignorant locals speaking their own language in their own country? I wouldn't like that. Can you ask them to stop, it's rather rude of them?

[shobet]

Ding dong, I feel a certain amount of blood heading groin-wards. Yeah, I can see it now, I could be like a Jimmy Saville-type figure in my gold lame shell-suit, I'd be King of the Hill, erm Valley. I might even get first dibs on some bit of fluff, be the first to impregnate her! My royal line would live on! Fucking A, I'm moving.

Shob's other half here (he's on kitchen duty and I just read the thread), we've been toying with the idea of a fancy dress party - theme "chavtastic" to honour the unwanted lot in the rented house nearby (they still didn't manage to fall off the roof and break their necks, damned spoilsports, I was watching eagerly and contemplating shooting liquid soap up with a waterpistol), as soon as I find the proper two-tone wig, orange spray-tan and a "fuck me, I'm a pregnant council estate minor with 3 kids in 3 different colours" outfit, all systems are go and we expect you here...

Oh, hang on. Guyver, are you sure there are none of the ignorant locals speaking their own language in their own country? I wouldn't like that. Can you ask them to stop, it's rather rude of them?

Must place call to Italian, Swedish and German family (and the rest of the inbread bunch) telling them to start speaking English in their own countries as to be not impolite, I can imagine they will be VERY impressed... Especially the Italians

[Rsmacker]

I hope he's wearing a pinny. A flowery one.
No, one of those hilarious ones that look like a pair of tits.


Summon me, and I shall crawl there, Mistress. I am truly filth beneath your heels. Beat me and crush me.


(It's about time Shobs tasted some pain, he really would love it, I know he would)