Advice column questions

[Ben...]

I'm doing an advice column for an assignment for school. Do any of you have some questions I could answer? They can be as screwball crazy as you want but they have to be school appropriate. The type of questions I'm looking for are like Ann Landers columns or like Jack the Riffer asks Bill once in a while (See sig. for the start of one). Any questions will be much appreciated.

Thanks in advance everyone! This should be fun.

[phill_up]

Dear Dr. Ben,
The kid come home the other day and ask who made God. She said she already ask the teacher and the teacher told her to ask us. I just told her she didn't need to know everything at once and she would figure things out as time goes along.

Do you have a better answer?

[Ben...]

PERFECT! Let's keep them coming.

[phill_up]

hey, are we going to get a real answer out of this?

[Ben...]

hey, are we going to get a real answer out of this?

I can put what I answered. That question is really, really hard though. I'm definitely putting that question in. It's exactly what I'm looking for. I'll post the answer tomorrow.

[Rsmacker]

Dear Ben

I'm in love with a certain person, but that person won't acknowledge the special magic we have, for example, trying to deny things on message boards and insulting me. Yet when we are alone, they are a different person - submissive, ultra-feminine, so eager to please. I'm at my wits end, I'm so confused.

You see, this wonderful person is supposed to be my special "slave", but I think I'm being manipulated, I think they are the one in control.
It's not about the sex, in fact our sex life is fantastic. This person is inventive, adventurous, demanding - if anything they wear me out with their persistent demands. A whole new world, previously unknown to me, has been opened up. It's like a wild roller-coaster ride, new experiences every time, crazy things that I couldn't possibly describe here in public. Often I find myself blushing at the acts this person has had me indulge in. I'm pretty sure some of them are illegal, and certainly the vast majority are immoral.

Sometimes I feel like I'm being used, a simple tool for their pleasure, and it makes me think that I might not be as special to him. In fact there is a third person I suspect is involved in the equation, someone whose name has slipped out in the throes of passion. Now, my sweetheart has denied everything, said it was a simple slip of the tongue and I don't know whether to believe it or not. Could this be the case, or am I being used, a sex object? I can't stand the turmoil I feel, especially knowing this person is the most popular member of staff in their Call Centre in Nottingham, in fact he has a bit of a reputation for being a stud.

Oh, please help me Ben, I really don't know who to turn to, I'm being eaten up.

Thank you

Mr Rsmacker.

[levantin]

Dear Auntie Ben,

I have an addiction to an internet forum. I feel compelled to check new posts every time I sit in front of the computer. The weird thing is, I actually joined up to discuss music and guitars but have found myself reading all kind of nonsense posted by guys who talk about their balls all the time, moobed admins, pervy British people, guys who like to post pictures of their girlfriend's ass and generally wacky weirdos from all corners of the globe. Some of my friends have been able to give up this addiction but I have not been so lucky. What sholuld I do?

[phill_up]

you nailed it levantin!

[Newc]

but they have to be school appropriate.

I think you guys missed this line.

[Ben...]

I think you guys missed this line.

Yeah kinda but I shall see what I can do with them.

[markD]

dr. ben,

i am a christian and divorced. i recently met this AWESOME christian girl that i am quite crazy for. she and i have hit it of wonderfully and things have been going in a very promising direction. she is crazy about me and believes that God may brought us together. i feel the same. my family is very accepting of her, despite that she is a bit younger than me. i am 35, she is 26. no big deal, really.

well, her family is NOT so accepting of me. her brother told her that if i make her happy, then he's happy for her. her parents said that i seem like a wonderful guy, but not for her. they do not believe that divorced people and unmarried people should be together based on some scripture in the book of matthew.

this morning, out of the blue, she broke things off with me based on what her parents said. i was blind sided!!! i am quite crushed to say the least. she wrote it to me instead of calling me because (in her words) "if i called you i know i'd change my mind." she also told me that she thinks i am a great guy and that she doubts she'll find another guy like me. she'd like to stay friends because she can't imagine me NOT in her life at all.

the thing that diappoints me the most, is that this kind of thing keeps happening to me. i am always a "great guy" and she always wants me to be her friend. i am looking to get remarried, NOT score on random chicks - so this sort of reccurring "rejection" is starting to hit me pretty hard.

i'd appreciate some thoughtful advice and not anything that ridicules me for decisions i have made.

thanks!!

BTW - this is real and true...as of today.

[Rsmacker]

Hey, mine was appropriate for school. There's absolutely nothing obscene in it, you have no idea how long it took me to pull that off (oo-er). In fact, it's very educational : there's some strange people out there.

[stevoc]

Dear Auntie Ben,

I have an addiction to an internet forum. I feel compelled to check new posts every time I sit in front of the computer. The weird thing is, I actually joined up to discuss music and guitars but have found myself reading all kind of nonsense posted by guys who talk about their balls all the time, moobed admins, pervy British people, guys who like to post pictures of their girlfriend's ass and generally wacky weirdos from all corners of the globe. Some of my friends have been able to give up this addiction but I have not been so lucky. What sholuld I do?

Share the link!!!!! Share the link!!!!! We want to visit too!!!!

[guitarsjb]

Dear Dr. Ben,

I hate my job. I'm surrounded by a bunch of back-stabbin old bitties. I know I'm supposed to respect my elders, but they are just a bunch of old busy bodies.

They intentionally keep things stirred up, and talk about everyone to everyone else. It's getting unbearable. They told my best friend that I said some mean things about her that I NEVER said. When I confronted them the just said "now, now dear, there's nothing to fret about." Fret about? What's that about, do they play guitar too??

I can't just quit my job, so what is the best way to kill them without getting caught? *feel free to change that line for your school safe stuff* LOL

I'd appreciate any ideas you may have.

[Ben...]

Wow, great questions everyone! I will be using as many of them as possible. After I'm done my assignment I shall post some of the answers.