fuggin' Squirrel in my basement

[Cleveland Metal]

i dont wanna catch it! I just want it to leave haha....

My dad said he shot one once and it smelled in that spot for well over 6 months, OUTSIDE...

Ugh... Sucks cuz I go in that house and sometimes I get the whiff of them... Sorta lucky it's vacant right now. Wish the fuckers that broke in and stole the copper wire and pipes out of the place woulda met up with the skunks...

[SEEGERMANY]

I shot three baby skunks last year at my clinic. I just happened to be looking out the back window and saw all three exit a hole in the ground. Since we have a little clinic dog, I didn't want to take a chance and have her get sprayed.

I went home at lunch and came back with a .22 caliber pellet rifle. I wanted to use the Remmington 1100, but figured another business owner might object. When they started to spread out, I let them get 40-50 yards from the back door, then I walked out there and shot each one in the noggin. Yes, all three sprayed!

[WarPig]

We have a squirrel-meister... that's prettty cool...

So, how do I get rid of skunks that are living under my rental house? Was thinking of a one way door on the hole they go in... But not sure how to make one!

Ok, a couple of things about skunks:

1. A skunk is first cousin to a ferret.

2. They won't spray unless they feel threatened, or you've come between a female and her kits. Before they spray, they will make an attempt to scare you off: stamp their front feet, turn their back towards you, raise their tail (at which point, it's time to get the hell out!). They have an effective target range of 9 - 15 feet.

3. Skunks like warm, dry, dark and defensible areas, such as in crawlspaces, an abandoned groundhog burrow, a hollow log. They can and will dig a burrow if they find a suitable place.

4. Skunks eat grubs, earthworms, mice, carrion and garbage/food scraps. If a skunk has taken up residence, chances are there is a viable food source nearby.

If you can eliminate the source of food on your property, and fill in the burrow (once they have vacated), they will most likely wander to someone else's property.

Very often, people have no idea they have a skunk living on/near them until they see it on a regular basis - or have a "bad encounter" (usually an unleashed dog that's aggressive).

All cities have animal control officers; their job is to help in situations like this. Unfortunately, many states now have "relocation laws" that prohibit the release of a nuisance animal anywhere else than the property where it was caught. Protocol is euthanasia - done at the animal shelter or a vet's office (the vet will have wildlife qualifications).

We have a couple skunks in our neighborhood; they have lived under our house for awhile (they move out after about a year). They hunt Japanese beetle larvae in our lawn, and snack on what drops out of the bird feeder. I've come nose-to-nose with them on more than one occasion; we *both* run in opposite directions. One night I was unaware there was one nearby when I was fixing a light barrier in our hedge. I finished what I was doing, and turned to see him watching me. I said "Ok, I'm done", and walked away; the skunk was nonplussed.

Bottom line: you want them to move elsewhere, either by their choice or animal control; you don't want to kill them, unless you want to leave your house for the 3 - 5 weeks it takes the smell to dissipate.

[SEEGERMANY]

All cities have animal control officers; their job is to help in situations like this.

"Hey Jake, we've got a skunk problem at 1313 Mockingbird lane"

"Hey boss, fuck you!"

[guitarsjb]

Yeah for the squirrel!!!

Thanks Scott, I'm happy now.

[WarPig]

"Hey Jake, we've got a skunk problem at 1313 Mockingbird lane"

"Hey boss, fuck you!"

Yep, could happen.

That's when you go on Google and type in "skunk rescue, Ohio".

The Wildlife Rehabber site (http://www.wildliferehabber.org/st_disp_list.php) lists 11 rehabs; of those it looks like eight may be able to help (on a quick look). Most (if not all) rehab organizations consist primarily of volunteers with areas experience in different animals. At the very least, they can give accurate information on how to solve your problem (usually to the satisfaction of all, the animal included).

[SEEGERMANY]

What a stinking job!

"Honey, I'm home! Honey? Honey? HONEY?"

[OnlineStageGear]

Every once in a while I will get a bird down my furnace chimney and in the basement. My cats usually hear it before I do. First time it happened I had no idea what the heck was going on with my cats untill I heard the bird myself. They aren't that hard to catch really. Now the little field mice that the cats sometimes bring home alive and plop on the floor are a differen't story.

[Rsmacker]

Ok, a couple of things about skunks:

1. A skunk is first cousin to a ferret.

2. They won't spray unless they feel threatened, or you've come between a female and her kits. Before they spray, they will make an attempt to scare you off: stamp their front feet, turn their back towards you, raise their tail (at which point, it's time to get the hell out!). They have an effective target range of 9 - 15 feet.

3. Skunks like warm, dry, dark and defensible areas, such as in crawlspaces, an abandoned groundhog burrow, a hollow log. They can and will dig a burrow if they find a suitable place.

4. Skunks eat grubs, earthworms, mice, carrion and garbage/food scraps. If a skunk has taken up residence, chances are there is a viable food source nearby.

5. They speak French.

6. You can lure them away by painting a white stripe down the back of a sexy female black cat. The skunk will follow it anywhere, proclaiming his luuuurve for 'er. True - I saw it on the telly.

[WarPig]

Every once in a while I will get a bird down my furnace chimney and in the basement. My cats usually hear it before I do. First time it happened I had no idea what the heck was going on with my cats untill I heard the bird myself. They aren't that hard to catch really. Now the little field mice that the cats sometimes bring home alive and plop on the floor are a differen't story.

Havahart makes a cage trap, but the best ones are the live traps by Victor (yep, the company that specializes in rodent death! ). They cost about $3 at Home Depot for a set of two. They need to be used on a hard, level surface (no carpet, but you could put a magazine down first). Really easy to use: put a small dab of peanut butter in the bottom, place on the floor with the front end tipped down and the door up. Check often (at least morning and night - due to their high metabolism and nervous nature, they can die of stress if left for more than 8 hours). When you see the door is down, take the trap (with mouse inside) a mile or so away, press the lock tab and open the door. I've had instances where the mouse was so reluctant to leave the warmth that I had to shake him out of the trap. Twice (he jumped back in!).

If you are concerned about "cooties", wear rubber gloves when handling the occupied trap, and wash it thoroughly when you get home (chances are the mouse will have pissed it all up from fright when he was in there).

My brother-in-law has a cat whose mouth is too small to get a mouse in it, so she will catch them and bring them to him, after which he puts them in a covered cup and escorts them back to the wild.

[Rsmacker]

Trust me, there is nothing on Earth worse than pickled skunk!

Ha! Try getting a whiff of my bedroom first thing in the morning after I have been on a Lager and Curry Frenzy, you would pray for the sweet smell of pickled skunk.

I remember my dear old Ma at home, bursting into my bedroom after the ming had seeped out from my room and was beginning to permeate the rest of the house, from the depths of sleep I'd hear
" Bloooooooooody hell! Jeeeeeeeeeeeeesus wept. Are you alright son, do you want a doctor?"
Followed by retching as she launched herself across the room to open the windows to try and dissipate the stink. If I wasn't too hungover I'd leap up and block the doorway, she'd start screaming as the evil cloud was released from under my bed-quilt, barge me out of the way and tell me I wasn't allowed out until I stopped farting. Of course, I'd shut the windows (a rat likes the smell of its own hole) and would have to wander into the kitchen, let one off, then retire to bed again. Oh, happy days!

Skunk, pah. I fart at your skunk.

[Rsmacker]

chances are the mouse will have pissed it all up from fright when he was in there.

Mice have no bladder control, they leak piss everywhere they go, as opposed to rats which choose where they piss.

My brother-in-law has a cat whose mouth is too small to get a mouse in it, so she will catch them and bring them to him, after which he puts them in a covered cup and escorts them back to the wild.

Ah, nothing like a tight pussy, far better than those wide-mouthed slack things.

[Rsmacker]

Stuka, if you had released that grey squirrel in the wild over here in the UK, you would have comitted an offence. They are non-indigenous animals so legally have to be killed. They are responsible for the decline of the native red squirrel, a far more timid creature.

I found this out from a pest controller who came to remove a mink from my fucking house. What a nasty savage little bastard (the mink, not the controller), it screamed like a skinned baby when he was trying to corner it. That had to be killed on the spot too.

Soooooo, we have 2 species of aggressive, destructive, loud vermin. Both of them come from..........America!!! Well, what a surprise!

Apparently, the grey squirrel just wandered about telling the reds that the woods here were shit, far bigger and better back home, that they invented woods etc.
"Hey Jeannie-Lou! These god-damn Limey fucks only have hazel-nuts. Boiled. Hey buddy, you got any Macademia Pecan nut supersize pies?" (All with large cameras round their necks and Hawaiian shirts on. Probably)
It drove the reds completely mental so they left.

And that's true that is.

[SEEGERMANY]

"NUTS!"

[Cleveland Metal]

Yeah, I'm in Cleveland. No animal control to even come out, those guys only do wild or menacing dogs. Only private exterminators would touch a skunk for about $300. haha

Fods is served up by all these idiots garbage that is loose or sitting in bags everywhere. These skunks are obese I tell ya... Lotsa rice and beans to be had. And my neighbors feed these wild feral cats that are everywhere.

These, have a nice dry space... My basement crawlspace under my rental, haha....

I boarded up their hole and they dug around it

Maybe I'll play 80 hair music in the house and drive them away. I think their black or hispanic skinks...