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Mechanic. I have to be here in case anything bad happens : steam leaks, pipe ruptures, pump failures. Its been quiet, so I'm more like a babysitter today
I'm not afraid to bleed, but I won't do it for you.
Mechanic. I have to be here in case anything bad happens : steam leaks, pipe ruptures, pump failures. Its been quiet, so I'm more like a babysitter today
Sorry you guys feel bad. Here's a little joke to perk ya up!
Better Than A Flu Shot
Miss Beatrice, The church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cute glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a condom!
When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. 'Miss Beatrice', he said, 'I wonder if you would tell me about this?' pointing to the bowl. 'Oh, yes,' she replied, 'Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little
package on the ground. The directions said, to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter.'
I had a quiet day with my wife and two boys. She wanted to make this a real special one due to impending heart surgery in March for her. She is only 40, but due to the type of surgery and length needed on bypass, alot of shit could go wrong. Her odds are better than some, but it is a hell of a dark cloud hanging over the holidays. Anyway, at least we all have this forum and each other. There have been several times in the last couple of years where the people on this board have been supportive and inspirational to me. Merry Xmas guys and gals.
I was glad to have a little Christmas Day sanity over at my parents' house, because Christmas Eve with my wife's extended family was an experiment in chaos. Get four generations of people who don't like each other to gather in one room (rented hotel banquet hall) with "doing it for Grandma" as the only plausible reason. In this case, Grandma has ten kids, most with children and grandchildren of their own. From the perpetually drunk uncle to my batshit-crazy mother-in-law (with husband #3 - or is it #4? - along for the ride) to the unsupervised kids running around screaming, it was hell on Earth. My monster-in-law pesters me at least every half-hour about when I'm going to give her some grandchildren, which unfortunately seems to encourage distant relatives I've never met to start asking about it. I've tried to explain that any kids in my future will "happen" when we are damned good and ready, and certainly not on someone else's schedule. As it was, seeing the unholy spawn running rampant around me served as very effective birth control. Why didn't someone give me a taser for Christmas?
Then came the gift exchange. I can't even explain the process behind it, other than that it was some variation of "Secret Santa" gone horribly wrong. I don't remember what I got. Probably for the best. This little slice of paradise is actually associated with a nearby casino, so most of these fine folks went off to gamble for the rest of the night. We made our escape and were home by midnight.
Well my son is only 9 so I'm half way down the road of freedom from her, oddly enough today is her birthday. She had the nerve to ask what I got her, I simply replied I'm just gonna stay away from you today so it's a win-win situation needless to say it didn't go well , but it put a smile on my face.
Inazone you are a much better man than I am that's for sure :ROTF:
Inazone, that sounds strangely like my ex-wife's family... Except their get togethers weren't finished til someone got their drunken ass beat, or the police came... Ummm, or both...
I'm just thankful I always had custody of my son and she had VERY minimal visitation since he was 2, so I never had to really go do anything I didn't wanna do.
I'm think my ex is finally starting to realize I'm not likely to talk to her again. No calls this Thanksgiving or Christmas. Just a text T-Day and an email on Christmas... Getting better I should have appreciated my holidays for that alone.
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