Wouldn't Trade My Childhood For Nothing

[joelayres]

Shops shut on Sundays. No ifs, no buts, they ALL did, and that was that.

Yup - in the early '70's, I remember EVERYTHING being closed on Sundays and holidays (except churches on Sunday). Couldn't even get gas. People were actually forced to have a meal at home.

[SEEGERMANY]

It's funny watching this thread as a bunch of old curmudgeons carry on about how "we didn't need a bunch of stuff. We left the house in the morning and made our own fun" and then go on to reminisce about all the different toys & games & gadgets they had back in the day

Yes, we had toys. But we didn't, nor were we allowed, to stay cooped up in the house hour after hour after hour playing with our Hot Wheels.

My mother was fanatical about the appearance of our yard. It was always manicured during Spring, Summer, and early Fall. But when we got the football itch, our front yard became the fucking Rose Bowl! We'd trample the St. Augustine grass down to it's roots! If it wasn't a spirited football game or if we were short of players, there was always "Throw Back Smear" or "Smear The Queer!"

Since my mom and dad coached little league and girl's basketball, there were always kids at the house. My mom never had a shortage of popsicles, fudgesicles, or Kool-Aid to cool us down! Someone mentioned drinking water from the garden hose! Hell yea! That was the BEST water on the planet. Of course, during the summer you had to be patient for the cold water to displace the steaming water built up in the hose!

Remember Animal Crackers? Mom would drag your happy ass to the grocery store and no matter how bored you got, a box of Animal Crackers saved the day! I wonder if she ever paid for those crackers.

Speaking of toys, it's amazing some of the shit that was sold that never worked like it did on TV. Water Wiggles, Slip N Slides, shit like that. Maybe we were just being prepared for the REAL WORLD!

[Rsmacker]

This one deserves a post of its own.

On Saturday mornings, telly started at 9.25am (unless you wanted to watch Dexter Dexter on the Open University banging on about some boring experiment he did with sodium hydroblahblah vapour. No "Brainiac" here, nothing blowing up, just boredom until proper telly kicked off).

Now, you either were a nice swotty stiffo kid who watched MultiColoured Swap Shop, with that nice Noel Edmonds, or you were an uncouth yob who watched an obviously hungover Chris Tarrant throwing buckets of gunge over all and sundry, picking kids up by their ears, and never having any semblance of a script on the legendary TISWAS program.

Guess which one I watched, along with my dad, who liked Sally James in her thigh boots.

It was mayhem, just loads of bizarre shit, like Motorhead, playing outside, on the back of a lorry, in an empty Birmingham carpark, on a dull November morning, Lemmy smoking, they'd have a fit if that got shown on kids' telly now. Custard pie fights, competition winners totally gunked up, all the adults locked in a cage and just abused for hours with buckets of water and slime. Comedians who were bordering on the mentally ill, like John Gorman, Norman Collier etc, just....well......monging about in stupid police costumes, being stupid. Real live loose cannons, they were, on LIVE kid's TV. I think I dented every tin tray in our house after watching some nutter wearing shorts and wellies singing a song and just twatting himself on the head with a tray. Why? Beats me, but he was always popping up.

Bob Carolgees and his dog Spit, whose sole contribution was to...well...spit when his name was mentioned. Lenny Henry back when he was funny, along with comics who were obviously dropping into the studio on their way back from all-night piss-ups. Real foul-mouthed adult comics from working men's clubs, like Bernard Manning, just what the fuck were they doing on kids' TV? Getting covered in custard pies, mostly, and smoking.
I still say that Trevor McDonut presents the News at Ten.

The more I think about it, the more of a totally crazy program it was, not one manufactured to look whacky or zany, they were all mental. The studio was always like a bomb-site, the kids were just by-the-by, everyone and everything got covered in gunk, pie and water. How it got past the first few programs, I'll never understand, but it became a British Institution. Eeh, I'm getting all misty-eyed about it.

Yanks (and other Johnny Foreigners), do yourself a favour, look at this for a taste of what I'm talking about

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=zOwokGfD4zQ&feature=related

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=Xld_q1re_Uo&feature=related

I mean, check out Cozy Powell, interviewed, on this kid's program. Who, in his manager's office, thought, Hmmm, this'll be some good publicity for Cozy.....?
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=_akXxGIA_ZQ&feature=related


http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=_j1S0COkQr4&feature=channel

There's stacks of it about, check it out, then you'll understand why British people of my age are fucked up.

How about this with Robert Plant, Cozy Powell and later on, Genesis, I wonder how many LPs they sold thanks to this publicity? The mind boggles....
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=FBpZ6xthCgY&NR=1

[SEEGERMANY]

Just a few of the "Babes" from our TV youth (minus Mrs. Howell). You also had the chicks from Eight Is Enough, The Brady Bunch, Sally Struthers before she started eating African children, etc, etc, etc.

[bloodlust]

for kids my age who grew up in the 90s, something ive found very true is that 99% of us cant hear "now this is a story all about how my life got flipped turned upside down..." without finishing the song

[guitarsjb]

Strech Armstrong. How long did it take til you took a knife to him to see what was inside? Not very long I bet. LOL

[wetrx95]

Don't forget the Cheryl Tiegs poster with her in the white one piece; or my absolute favorite was the one of Heather Thomas in that frriggen awesome pink two-piece; Catherine Bach (when she was hot)..oh and the General Lee I suppose; remember sneaking out to watch the Dukes of Hazzard? Speaking of animal crackers; I used to get Cheerios as a snack from my Gandma; drag races on my big-wheel

[SEEGERMANY]

You're welcome!

[Rsmacker]

Other fond memories:


1. Finding a ripped up porno mag stuffed under a bush. Us kids could spot them a mile off, it was one of the best things ever to find a porno, though we'd then have to divvy it up, and work out how to get it into the house, past Sentry Mum, who could sniff out an illict porno a mile away. For what purpose this had to be done, I don't know, this was before the days of the white wee-wee, but we just all had that primal urge.

Kids today with their online galleries of multiple cum-shots and air-tight penetration, they'll never experience the joy of finding a rain-soaked skin magazine and being desperate to not be the kid who ends up with the section about fucking steam trains when it is shared out. (Not fucking steam trains, just fucking steam trains, OK)

I remember seeing a so-called hardcore mag, Whitehouse, IIRC, looking at an axe-wound of a muff and thinking, fucking hell, there's no way I'm going near one of them, it looks ferocious. Oh yes, days of innocence, when arses were simply for shitting out of too, not places to stuff things.

2. White dog shit. I know it's a bit of a cliche now, but come on, childhood = white dogshit. Or dogshit in general, namely sliding into a fresh squidgy pile of it in your new England football kit, or throwing little brothers into it (not mine, naturally, someone else's).

I refuse to carry a little plastic bag to pick up my dog's shit, those kids will just have to learn some ball skills and slalom round the little surprises she leaves on the goal line for them. It's character building, teaches you that life is sometimes a great big pile of stinking shit, and that it can be a long walk home in tears to get changed. That is truly education. (No, my doggy is well wormed, so she has no blindness causing parasites. Well-looked after dogs don't).

3. Ford Cortina. Pile of shit, end of story. If only we could have gone on holiday just once without breaking down, or having to rebuild the fucking thing by the side of the M6. As for British Leyland cars - they didn't get us as far the M6. Total shit.

[Rsmacker]

4. Throwing Action Man out of a bedroom window, with parachute, mysteriously on fire. (My brother's Action Man, naturally, mine was a super soldier and wouldn't have been captured and tortured in such a way)

I still get grief over this. I'm thirty fucking nine years old.

[Robert Hendrix]

DAMN!! I don't know why I haven't click on this thread sooner. I've missed alot of great memories. Here's some of the biggest things I remember from my childhood. Some of it has probably already been mentioned but...

Spending 6 bucks to see Black Sabbath and Van Halen on the same stage.

My first rock concert Elvis Presley

Kate Jackson

Walking or riding my bike 5 miles to the nearest convenience store to get an Icee or a coke in a glass bottle for a quarter.

The Babando Pistola!

My first car ( a 1964 Ford Falcon with no first gear )

Don Kirshners Rock Concert

Saturday night live was actually funny

The only thing denim had Levis or Wrangler on the pocket

Cutting class and criuzin with my best friend in his Chevy Vega Wagon

Kate Jackson

Bell Bottom Corduroys (well, some things are best left in the past):ROTF:

Alice Coopers Welcome to my Nightmare special on TV

Night Flight (First Cable music show I remember)

Boy scout trips, merit badges, and camping.

Tanya Roberts was actually hot then!

Did I mention Kate Jackson??

WKRP (the original series)

Daisy BB Rifles... With REAL BBs

Building go carts out of scrap wood and lawn mower wheels and having nieghborhood races

And the best thing I remember...

Going to the local pharmacy (where they had a grill and a soda jerk) getting a REAL hamburger where they put REAL butter on the bun and toasted it on the grill and aades fresh lettuce, tomatoes onions ect. No McDonald, Wendys or Burger King could hold a candle to those burgers..

Oh yeah... And Kate Jackson

[shobet]

Guess which one I watched, along with my dad, who liked Sally James in her thigh boots.

I'll never forget!

[SEEGERMANY]

Hell, I thought that was Rick Derringer!

[shobet]

Hell, I thought that was Rick Derringer!

Nice to know you paid more attention to the boys...

[SEEGERMANY]

Hey, she looks like a boy compared to what I posted above!