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So I have this raccoon breaking into my back porch...

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  • So I have this raccoon breaking into my back porch...

    ...I guess this is only something that would happen in New Hampshire....

    Well, it didn't really bother me that much, but I fixed the screen through which it was coming, thinking it couldn't get back in.

    Well last night he broke in again, but this time chewed up my poker table. Now I am BULLSHIT. I set up a rat trap. I am hoping to catch him tonight. If I do, and he survives the trap, I am going to kick him to death with steel toes.

    Normally I love animals and would never want to hurt them, but this really pissed me off. I don't know why he keeps breaking in but it stops tonight.

    Mini rant over.
    "I would have banned you for taking part in hijacking and derailing a thread when you could have started your own thread about your own topic." - Unknown

  • #2
    Don't do it that way, just poison him he will go off and die.
    Check-it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMKmQmkJ9gg

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    • #3
      You are better off getting a live trap and using peanut butter cups for bait (animal control will assist after it is contained). Raccoons are fairly nasty critters, very well equipped to make you life miserable even if the steel toes do work, and carry a myriad of diseases.
      Bon Jovi is like a frozen Coca Cola.. It's cool, it's crunchy, but when all is said and done it is still pop....

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      • #4
        Watch out for those guys - they can rip you up in a second - they are quick and stronger than you can imagine.
        Strat God Music
        http://www.esnips.com/web/Strat-God-Music/?flush=1

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        • #5
          One can cat food + one can Copenhagen = bye bye raccoon...

          Or just do what my buddy in Memphis did - set out a can of catfood in the back yard, get the scoped .22 with sub-sonic loads and lie in wait on your roof...
          Crime doesn't pay. Neither does lutherie...

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          • #6
            "Well last night he broke in again, but this time chewed up my poker table. Now I am BULLSHIT!"..:ROTF:

            "Bill, Smoke a Bowl and Crank Van Halen I, Life is better when I do that"
            Donnie Swanstrom 01/25/06..miss ya!

            "Well, your friend would have Bell's Palsy, which is a facial paralysis, not "Balls Pelsy" like we're joking about here." Toejam's attempt at sensitivity.

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            • #7
              Lol. Well after leaving the rat trap there for a while, I started to feel guilty and decided I didn't want to kill him. He is only trying to find food.

              I might have to rent a have a heart trap... they cost 55 bucks to buy from the hardware store.

              And the animal control around here won't help with a raccoon. Only dogs apparently.
              "I would have banned you for taking part in hijacking and derailing a thread when you could have started your own thread about your own topic." - Unknown

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Musician78 View Post
                Lol. Well after leaving the rat trap there for a while, I started to feel guilty and decided I didn't want to kill him. He is only trying to find food.

                I might have to rent a have a heart trap... they cost 55 bucks to buy from the hardware store.

                And the animal control around here won't help with a raccoon. Only dogs apparently.
                Just call a local cat rescue and tell them its a cat coming too your porch at night they will lend you one. Put it in an open ended cardboard box so you can drag it outside.
                Check-it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMKmQmkJ9gg

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Musician78 View Post
                  Lol. Well after leaving the rat trap there for a while, I started to feel guilty and decided I didn't want to kill him. He is only trying to find food.

                  I might have to rent a have a heart trap... they cost 55 bucks to buy from the hardware store.

                  And the animal control around here won't help with a raccoon. Only dogs apparently.

                  Animal Control is supposed to handle everything, not just dogs. You may have dialed the number for the local animal shelter thinking it's animal control (most people do that).

                  And no it's not limited to your area, we get them here in West TN. Place we used to live had 15 'coons at once in our backyard one night.

                  Right now we've got one that comes up and eats the cat's food. We've also got a skunk that lives under the house.

                  They scamper away when I go out and yell "this is not a soup kitchen!"
                  I want to depart this world the same way I arrived; screaming and covered in someone else's blood

                  The most human thing we can do is comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.

                  My Blog: http://newcenstein.com

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by newc View Post
                    they scamper away when i go out and yell "this is not a soup kitchen!"
                    no soup for you ! Outta the yard !
                    Check-it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMKmQmkJ9gg

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Newc View Post
                      Animal Control is supposed to handle everything, not just dogs. You may have dialed the number for the local animal shelter thinking it's animal control (most people do that).
                      Actually I went to the police station to get the animal control officer's number. Well, they don't give that out. Instead, they gave me directions to his house. When I told them that I needed his assitance with the raccoon, I was told not to even bother going to his house because he doesn't deal with those. Just dogs. That's it, lol. Defies logic, but whatever. They were nice enough to give me the number for the state agency who would deal with it.... for a cost, of course....

                      I'm gonna have to deal with it myself. *sigh*
                      "I would have banned you for taking part in hijacking and derailing a thread when you could have started your own thread about your own topic." - Unknown

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                      • #12
                        I had a pet baby Racoon called "Bandit" when I was a kid. My dad grabbed him somehow. We treated it just like any pet..like a dog. But their NOT domestic animals and the lil' fucker would just attack without provcation. I was laughin' my ass off when he tore into my brother..that's when we had to let it go. They're not like a submissive dog. Once it peed on the floor and my dad stepped in it, and put his nose by it..the fucker went crazy. I was laughin' my ass off. It attacked my whole family. Never me tho..

                        He was cool when he was young but when he was about a year old he just became vicious. Those fuckers are badasses!!

                        He was awesome!
                        "Bill, Smoke a Bowl and Crank Van Halen I, Life is better when I do that"
                        Donnie Swanstrom 01/25/06..miss ya!

                        "Well, your friend would have Bell's Palsy, which is a facial paralysis, not "Balls Pelsy" like we're joking about here." Toejam's attempt at sensitivity.

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                        • #13
                          There's got to be a local warden or something that handles those problems. If you get caught killing it..you'll end up on the fuggin' news for animal cruelty and shit. So..thee's got to be some animal control unit. You would think.

                          They don't handle rats..you could beat a rat like a baby seal "live" on the news. People don't give a crap about rats.

                          Isn't ironic how we pick and chose what animals must be protected and ones that are ...poop. Why?..because they're cute?

                          Like dolphins. Tuna is OK..I like Tuna. Fuck the Tuna fishes...but you gotta save the dolphins. What if dolphins are tastier than tuna..ever think of that? They prolly are. But they's CUTE and silly..so we can't kill those. Godammit.

                          I just poured some gasoline on two mountains of ants in my yard. It looked like I bombed Hiroshima and Nagasaki. I felt kinda bad afterwards. There's little ant families in there.

                          "Bill, Smoke a Bowl and Crank Van Halen I, Life is better when I do that"
                          Donnie Swanstrom 01/25/06..miss ya!

                          "Well, your friend would have Bell's Palsy, which is a facial paralysis, not "Balls Pelsy" like we're joking about here." Toejam's attempt at sensitivity.

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                          • #14
                            Dolphins are cute... surfing in California, the sunset, the beach, the ocean, me and the waves, the dolphins are surrounding me, moving like a ballet group... man I sound so fucking gay
                            "There is nothing more fearful than imagination without taste" - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

                            "To be stupid, selfish and have good health are three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, all is lost" - Gustave Flaubert

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Endrik View Post
                              Dolphins are cute... surfing in California, the sunset, the beach, the ocean, me and the waves, the dolphins are surrounding me, moving like a ballet group... man I sound so fucking gay
                              No Endy, I think I would make sweet love to a dolphin. They have a built-in glory holes for god sake!
                              "Bill, Smoke a Bowl and Crank Van Halen I, Life is better when I do that"
                              Donnie Swanstrom 01/25/06..miss ya!

                              "Well, your friend would have Bell's Palsy, which is a facial paralysis, not "Balls Pelsy" like we're joking about here." Toejam's attempt at sensitivity.

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