I gotta poop...again

[horns666]

Prolly from that damn bologna sanwich.

This is the third time on the throne so far

[Hellbat]

Man last Friday I had a poop attack. I must have had a bad ham sandwich. It was terrible, my ring muscle was all swollen and distended and looked like a bonobo chimps ass. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

[horns666]

Man last Friday I had a poop attack. I must have had a bad ham sandwich. It was terrible, my ring muscle was all swollen and distended and looked like a bonobo chimps ass. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

That's exactly what happened to me. I kept putting prepartion H on it..but I think that just pissed off my bung even more.

Do you know what's bad when this happens. Those are the days your wife wants to do it. Then by the time your ass heals..she's on her period, and that's when you wanna do it. It's always sumthin'..

[SEEGERMANY]

I just came in from cutting the grass and these threads are fuckin killing me! Great job my brother from another mother!

[horns666]

I just came in from cutting the grass and these threads are fuckin killing me! Great job my brother from another mother!

You got it Mr G!!!

I've been sooo fuggin' sidtracked with so much BS. Actually I just got Medicare..that's what I was so busy doing. But that's finally over. But they make you jump thru so many hoops to get that shit..and it's not even free.

That was a fuggin' stressful process and it's not really over yet!!

[SEEGERMANY]

Are you also looking into a supplemental policy to cover the 20% Medicare dis-allows? Normally, those policies are not that expensive.

[horns666]

Are you also looking into a supplemental policy to cover the 20% Medicare dis-allows? Normally, those policies are not that expensive.

YEah..like Medigap. Fortunately UnitedHealthcare will pay for my Med part B and lower their premiums for us retirees. So Medicare will be my primary and United will be my secondary..so things are working out OK.

I'm applay for a drug plan though..part D I guess. But I heard it kinda sucks. So I may look elsewhere for that.

But figuring this crap out on the phone all day make me woozy..

[Jayster]

Prolly from that damn bologna sanwich.

This is the third time on the throne so far

I don't know about a bad baloney sandwhich, but I do know you prolly shouldn't eat a laxitive and sleeping pill in the same night!

[Soap]

I pooped earlier a turd the size of Texas.
Once I relaxed a bit everything went well.
Even so, it was still a struggle.

[Rsmacker]

That's exactly what happened to me. I kept putting prepartion H on it..but I think that just pissed off my bung even more.

Do you know what's bad when this happens. Those are the days your wife wants to do it. Then by the time your ass heals..she's on her period, and that's when you wanna do it. It's always sumthin'..

Erm, clarify this, why would having a red raw ringpiece stop you from doing it?

Oh God, you are talking about that big veiny strap-on aren't you? Ooooooh, yep, I see now, I imagine that would put you off. Get her to tie you down and gag you, that does the trick, right Wilksy-Baby?

[horns666]

Erm, clarify this, why would having a red raw ringpiece stop you from doing it?

Oh God, you are talking about that big veiny strap-on aren't you? Ooooooh, yep, I see now, I imagine that would put you off. Get her to tie you down and gag you, that does the trick, right Wilksy-Baby?

Well I shoot the sherbert three times a week regardless if she's in the same room or not. But in my older age, being all swollen around the colon can really take the "oooomph" outta happy time.

[OnlineStageGear]

There is WAY too much info in this thread......

Matt

[horns666]

There is WAY too much info in this thread......

Matt

There'is NEVER "TMI" when it comes to me Matt..I wear my pud on my sleeve man.

It's like a tourettes syndrome kinda thing.

You should hear me in real life..wowee. :ROTF:

[SEEGERMANY]

I retrieved this one from the JCF "bowels." It's the post that sent fett over the edge.

After a late night of fine dining at a local Mexican resturant :ROTF: , I awoke to severe stomach cramps :ROTF: . As I journeyed towards the bathroom, oops, almost forgot :ROTF: , the rumbling in my stomach told me that I was seconds from disaster. Not one second, not two seconds, but only three seconds from relief! :ROTF: Whew! I made it! :ROTF: If I had stopped and let the dog out at the two second mark, I would have had to rent a carpet cleaner. By the way, I'm not being melodramatic! :ROTF:

As I sat on the porcelain throne and heard that first plop plop, oops, mandatory :ROTF: , I wondered if "old poo" was gonna be a sinker or a floater! My answer came shortly as I flushed the stinky mass. :ROTF: As the water started to rise, I knew I only had seconds to unstick a clogged toilet. The water rose swiftly and I knew I was approaching danger for the second time in one morning. With a swift plunge :ROTF: :ROTF: :ROTF: (figured I better triple up), the water stopped rising. With a second plunge, the water receeded slightly. With a third plunge, I saved the day! :ROTF:

You know, they say bad things happen in "threes." :ROTF:

P.S. I'm really shook up over this. :ROTF:

[Spivonious]