Is this trainwreck on the right track?

[MOSHWITZ]

I was dickin around this morning writing this riff and worked this up.
I'm just trying to get the starting point of the mix laid out.

The clip is short, The riffin is a little sloppy and loose, but they are just scratch tracks for now,,, but how does the overall mix sound? I have a few thoughts, but what do you think?

Any thoughts and critique's would be most appreciated.

https://soundcloud.com/moshwitz/d81

MOSHON
DAVE

[MOSHWITZ]

It was mentioned to me that the kicks were a little low so I brought them up just a couple db on the Kick comp make up gain and at first was concerned that they might be approaching being too loud or disconnected, but they seem to cut through a little better.

https://soundcloud.com/moshwitz/d81k3

I also upped it to soundclick cause the soundcloud trans-coding seems to add a little washy sound to the hi's...maybe it's just me :dunno:, but have a listen to this one also and see if there is any difference to you..

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=12223865

Can someone give this one a listen for what it is, and tell me if you here any trouble areas you think I need to work on. Can you hear the bass? does it sit ok with the guitars/ drums? or is there anything not jiving with or masking something else? Etc, Etc....

I'm not really concerned about the riffs themselves, as they are just scratch riffs of me dickin around,And I know if I tracked them tighter they would help solidify everything together more. As they are, the whole thing is just an exercise in itself to me, as I was working in some new plugins and wanted to see what fresh ears heard. but does the overall mix sound passably decent and I'm on the right track, or does it sound like shit and I should start over?

I'm just looking for some fresh ears to help me in the right direction and see if I'm using what I'm learning ( I think:think: correctly or what.

Thanks ahead guy's I'd really appreciate the critiques.

MOSHON
DAVE

[Evol]

I cannot hear the bass on the speakers I'm using at work, I'll try once I get home on my setup and see how it sounds there and let you know. Everything else sounds fine to me, I think you're on the right track, and personally I would keep developing that riff because you play the fuck out of it! haha Seriously, Mustaine could benefit from listening to your stuff and maybe get his band back on the right track!

[kuerbo]

Sounds fun! Love the speedy stuff.
Bass getting lost through my Tannoy Reveal speakers.
Keep 'em coming!

[Force]

Sounds perfect to my ears. Fucking hell Dave, you are awesome.

[Evol]

Ok, at home through the JBL's I can hear the bass much more, but it sounds even better on my Sennheiser HD280's. To me, it still seems the bass could come up a bit, you have a lot of mids with the guitar so it just needs to fill that space. The bass space. lol

[MOSHWITZ]

Thanks for the comps and checking it out guys.

I brought the bass up a couple db's see if this is better/ too loud/ not enough,,or??? etc. I have a thought about it what it is, but lets see what y'all hear first

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=12229906

MOSHON
DAVE

[Evol]

Oh hell yeah dude,. that's way better on my setup!

[kuerbo]

I like this version better. Sounds great tome. Killer job.

[straycat]

Bass still needs to come up some IMO.
My Boston's aren't picking them up too well.
Sounds killer tho'.

[axmann]

I'm also a bit low on the bass through headphones.I'll wind it up through the monitors later. Mosh, I find this a little different flavor than some of your other stuff. I dig it. Nicely done.

[VitaminG]

are you supposed to hear bass on this stuff?

Sounds great to me. I was just waiting for the vocals to come in.